Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Midscale

The Pig and Whistle is a large friendly looking place which is one half a restaurant and one half a very large bar with a single very large booth overlooking Greenwood Ave. The entire place is painted with colorful brush stroked walls and modernist/modernish paintings. There are two pool tables in the back and that about covers the bar.

Sean knew the waitress we had, but she was not you would call friendly. This job was definitely beneath her and serving us must have been the dullest thing she has ever had to do. No smile, just the drone of a dull job and uninteresting people. On the other hand, Jay at the bar was a good guy. He recommended a couple places in the area, but they were all many blocks from here and would have to be another night.

The drinks themselves were priced at about $4 and were fairly tasty. No bottom shelf gin and they were poured in a taller than average glass.

Oh, there was one thing that happened that really belongs in the journal, but well, screw it. There was this woman at the table next to us who was cackling the entire time we were there. Everything we said was hysterical because everything one of us finished speaking, she would cackle. I really wanted to make her shut up, as nothing is that funny. Well maybe not nothing.

The Pig and Whistle is probably a better food place than it is a drink place, but I could definitely see taking a first or second date for drinks. I give the Pig and Whistle a solid 3 Martini Glasses out of 5 provided that my next waitress has some vague spark of life hiding behind her eyes.

-wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

The only thing that cued us in that there was drinking to be done in the back lounge area was that they were on our list and the front door was open. Walking through the restaurant we were immediately transported back almost 50 years, but the patrons stayed the same age. All around this lounger were nautical touches. Wood paneling, old style life preservers, Dodi, our older Bouffant hair styled bartender, and salty old guys drinking at the bar.

We sat down at one of the table with 2 chairs and black dimpled leather wall booth seating. The chairs were a little wobbly and fairly old. We quickly figured out that there would be no waitress so I went up and ordered our drinks. Now I wasn’t really watching how Dodi poured our drinks so I was surprised as everyone else when I took a sip of my $3.50 drink. I almost did not make it as far as actually sipping my drink as the fumes coming off the glass stung my eyes. Wolf wasn’t paying attention and made a seriously bad “strong drink” face. You know the one. Jason steeled himself as his Vodka and Cranberry was the same color as the pinky flesh of his cheek.

These are sipping drinks, but only because to do it any other way would kill you. They might just make you pay, but I wasn’t going to find out. Wolf did make the mistake of chugging the last half of his glass because someone said he wouldn’t dare. I think Wolf went blind for a moment but I’m not sure. Then not to be outdone Jason chugged his. He fared about as well. So finally I say, “So I see that this is going to be a dick wagging contest.” To which Jason replied, “No. Don’t do it man. Be smart.” or something like that. I complied and sipped the rest of my drink. My momma didn’t raise no fool. Now the thing that cracks me up about this whole scene, is that this was shortly after Wolf has uttered the now famous phrase, “I think I can hear the ice crying.”

So the Baranof has the strongest drinks ever. They have a small dance floor, and a bunch of unused space fill tables that can’t see the bar. I have no idea how popular they are, but if you are looking for the best bang for your buck, stop in here for a drink or two and make sure Dodi is pouring it for you.

I give the Baranof 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5 in honor of its strong drinks and visually humorous atmosphere.

-wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

Now the first thing that you are greeted by when you walk into the China Jade is the smell and it is foul. I think that it was a mixture of stale Chinese food and mildew but it was hard to say. The lounge itself is ok though. It has a long curved bar, a small raised seating area, a bunch of tables and booths, and some utterly craptastic artwork on the wall. Now most of it looks like it was done by the guy who shows you how to make happy little trees (Bob somebody or other.) Maybe I just don’t like the style, but it didn’t do anything for me.

As it turns out though, Joe the bartender is a really good guy. We traded stories with him for a while and he regaled with some stories about life in the Merchant Marine and drinking in Iceland.

On Sunday nights, they have a lounge singer come in who is supposed to be a hoot but I suspect that I will never find out. While I stopped noticing the smell when the really strong drinks showed, this really isn’t my type of place. The staff is friendly and $3.50 drinks are strong, but it is more of a neighborhood bar than it is a lounge.

I enjoyed myself but that isn’t going to quite cut it. I will give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5 in honor of Mike and the nice hefty pour that I suspect he gives to everyone.

-wOOt

Its Tuesday and that means photography then drinking, and please kids, don’t drink and shoot. It can only lead you down the road of debauchery and stupidity. You will soon find yourself climbing on things you shouldn’t for a “great shot”, or taking pictures of your belly button lint because you think it will be cool. So remember if you find yourself with a beer in one hand and camera in the other, just put the camera back in your pocket and drink your beer.

I call Wolf to see if he wants to come out with us. I then call Jason to tell him I am coming over. I pick up Jason, Sean, Wolf and we head into Greenwood to finally make it to the Pig n Whistle. Oh, I had to lie to Wolf a little bit in order to get him to come out with us. You see, I know Wolf is a great to go out with, provided you can get him out the door. Now depending on the evening that can be more or less difficult based on circumstances I know nothing of. So the reason for this whole statement is that he asked me how many bars we were going to be hitting. I told him 2 maybe 3, when really I meant 3 probably 4. What is important is that I got him to come out and we all had fun.

Our first stop was the Pig N Whistle. We had a stand offish waitress who was uninteresting. Wolf picked up sponsorship of this bar. It was here that Jason told me that the Rain Dancer was no more. We now have our first dead bar. I’m actually kind of excited. We have been doing this long enough that they are going to start dying behind us. Is that actually a good thing?

From the Pig N Whistle we walked up the way to Baranof’s. I would never have picked this place out to actually go into, but I am glad that we did, it only for the story. Baranof has a nautical themed lounge in the back. We sat down and I got up to order drinks. Sean just got a Club Soda and Lime. Wolf asked for Gin and Juice and for some reason I got him a G&T. I guess the idea of Gin and Orange Juice was just kind of wrong to me and I subconsciously rejected it.

Now I watched Dodi, the bartendress, mix the drinks and perhaps mix is the wrong term for it. In order for her to have mixed the drinks, it would require there to be two ingredients in the drinks for that to be possible. Now while technically there were two, it is really only a technicality and strangely it is not what you may think. Dodi put in so little mixer, it was as if she considered it morally reprehensible to sully good booze with mixer. The drinks were so strong that Jason’s Cape Cod was flesh toned. My drink burned my eyes, and Wolf said the immortal phrase, “I think I can hear the ice crying.” There is in fact only one drink stronger than what we were poured there and that is only a technicality as there is no actual mixer in. That is the long fabled GinnyMcGin, which I believe consists of two types of gin and a splash of triple sec.

As we staggered out of Baranof’s it was over to the China Jade. Now at this point we still thought it would possible to hit the Crossroad on our way back. Oh how wrong we were. Now I want to say that this was the Pagoda Room but I just can’t be sure anymore. Anyhow when we first walk in we are struck by the smell, and it is not a good food smell. It is the kind of smell that you get when you walk into your aged grandmother’s house. We sat down at counter after asking the bartender if we could move some guys drink down the bar. He said sure and we did. Now I must say that I liked Mark, kooky old guy that he was. In addition, he mixed with a hand that was about as firm as Dodi’s. The main difference is that the glass was about 1 oz bigger and that meant that there was 1 oz more mixer, I hope. We also met Bob who is a waiter at the 13 coins downtown. I was hoping he was the bartender but it was too early for that. Bob also had a great line that night. “My mom always said that it doesn’t matter what you drink, it’s how much you drink.” Mark regaled us with stories of life on a fishing vessel and what it was like to visit Iceland. I guess it was something like $7 for beer because there is nothing else to do at night but drink. I can see that. The other strange thing, is that in Iceland the bars are taxed by the amount of booze that they sell. This means that every shot they pour is exactly to the line. You will never get a strong pour, and you will likely never get a weak pour as everyone knows exactly what the pour should look like. A policy like that would seriously hamper my ability to judge many of these bars.

From there it was a walk back to the car. We did in fact have to pass by the Crossroads as there was no way we could drink there. I stopped at Jack in the Box for food and since not a single one of us had any cash, I had to practically empty out my change slot so that I could buy $2.25 in food. Sheesh.

-wOOt

From the outside, it looked a lot like it was closed. There aren't any windows, and so you can't see the place inside. And beyond the doors, it still wasn't exactly packed. But since we like to visit the bars when they're empty or close to, that was kind of a plus. And with Bush Garden, I think it was a huge plus. Without it being the dead time between dinner and the nightly Karaoke, we wouldn't have had such a great time.

We came to the place because Trudy, the great bartender at the 1st Hill Bar and Grill (#47) had recommended we go see Jojo who tended bar at the Garden on Friday. It had taken a couple of weeks, but we finally made the trip. I walked up to the bar and asked if the woman behind it was indeed Jojo, she said she was, and we were off. We explained that Trudy had sent us, ordered our drinks, and got to explaining the whole quest.

Jojo liked the idea a lot. And we liked Jojo a lot. She was friendly, open, talkative, all the things you look for in a good bartender. The drinks were good, and not pricey, which is always better. And the food (we had lemon-grass chicken) was superb. I didn't even mean to have any, but Jojo said it was great and I should try some, and pretty soon I was on my third peice. She showed us how to twist our chopstick wrappers into chopstick stands, which was cool.

But I have forgotten one thing, which I must now mention. The hot towels. With food at the Garden, you get hot towels. Perhaps they're just for the hands, which is nice, but I've always been a guy to put a hot towel on the face, which is probably from a few too many old cartoons featuring shaving at a barber shop. However, and whatever the purpose of the towels, they were the most relaxing thing. I loved it. And this is just normal treatment.

We talked with a nice woman a couple of seats down, explaining to her as well as Jojo. Her name turned out to be Karen, and she and her husband own the place. She was very inquisitive, and funny, and I thought she was just a really friendly customer until right at the end, when we found out she was the owner. Which is cool, that it never came up.

So there's good drinks, good food, good staff. The place has Karaoke every night, and they also have tatami dining rooms you can reserve just by calling in, for your party of 4 or larger, since they can be rearranged. There's a sushi bar, too, and they have weekday sushi specials. Or, in other words, the place is a dream. We're going back for dinner soon, I'm sure of that.

My second favorite bit, after the towels, was the crane. Brandon and I each got one, just origami cranes, but it was a nice touch, I thought.

Great place, overall.

Located in the Yen Wor Restaurant in the Admiral District of West Seattle, this place is a quiet little bar with a couple of pool tables located behind a Chinese restaurant. While I've generally liked Chinese restaurant lounges, which as a whole seem to have strong drinks and a good look, this place was just plain and nothing remarkable. The drinks were okay, at acceptable prices, but there wasn't anything special. We didn't even try to talk to the bartender, and the crowd, small as it was, wasn't inviting. While the cheap pool might serve as an attraction, I don't think there's any reason to go back. Coming off the bundle of surprises that was the Bush Garden, it was a big letdown.

I hadn't thought, since I used to live there, that there was anyplace in Seattle for the cool, pretty crowd to go to. However, the Admiral Pub appears to have proved me wrong. The crowd was good looking, young, college types but without the frat feel that much of the U District presents. And the bar itself was pretty decent--pool tables, good music, friendly staff. Josh the bartender served up a quick pair of drinks, commented it was kind of slow (I didn't agree, but then I realized it was Friday, not Thursday as I had for a moment thought), and when we told him about our quest, he started listing off bars nearby.

Eventually, he got us a little list of bars just in the very near vicinity that we should visit, but we were really only looking for one more, and Josh's advice was the Benbow down the alley from the Admiral Pub's back door. So we chatted with Josh and a second bartender, Randy, for a bit longer, and then we finished our drinks and headed off to the Benbow.

As to the Admiral Pub, I think if you're out in the pleasant semi-suburbia of West Seattle, you should definitely go. In that sleepy little part of the city, it's a place where things are happening, even if it was a little slow for a Friday. The drinks were fine, so there's no problem there, and the crowd and staff are good.

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Midclass

Cooper’s is a simple looking establishment from the outside with a red overhang. Walking inside it is obvious that this is a local pub with local working class people and they are here to have a drink and watch the game. The place is mostly seating with a medium sized straight bar, 2 dartboards, a red felt pool table and a couple of TVs. There is also food service (like every other place in Seattle) that puts out a decent looking plate of nachos. In addition there is an impressive beer selection on tap, but I can’t remember if I saw Guinness on tap.

The bar staff was on the attractive side of average and they poured a decent drink. Unfortunately, I wouldn’t really call it a $4.25 drink so it is a little on the spendier side. The crowd was distinctly in the older category (late 30s through 50s). Off to one side there were board games (which I wonder if anyone actually uses).

The décor of note includes large metal signs proclaiming old product endorsements for beer and what not. There are high padded stools with plaid covering and a Juke Box. Otherwise it was fairly unremarkable.

Considering the huge impression this place made on me, I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Midscale

The Luau was everything that Cooper’s was not. It was lively, interesting, had friendly staff, interesting patrons, great looking food, and very tasty drinks. Upon walking in, we sat up at the medium sized curved bar and ordered drinks from Tito.

I was immediately struck by the Polynesian theme, which included; lots of little Tiki gods, a huge old style painted surfboard, an indoor thatch “hut”, mermaid olive skewers, and the general feel of fun and excitement. In the background there was island music playing which only lent to the already great ambience. I should also mention that the inside is non-smoking as the bar is right next to the dining room. Smoking can be done on their small but adequate patio.

The standard fare of drinks run $4.50 for a strong pour and not bottom tier booze. You can also get an honest to goodness metal bucket filled with 7 mini Coronas. They make zombies here and a number of other island drinks in large Tiki glasses. How cool is that. Tito also provided water in these funky looking glasses without being prompted. That is always a big plus in my book as water is good (and I don't drink nearly enough of it.)

I met several strange patrons and we also shook hands with Tony (a fellow bartender). The crowd was young and rowdy in the bar area. The diners did not even seem to notice the hubub going on over by us.

The Luau is everything that a theme bar/restaurant (including having some great looking food.) Its only downfall is that the bar area isn’t quite big enough. They need to buy out the dry cleaner next to them and expand out. I give it 4 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

Before I even set foot into Eva I could tell that it was the polar opposite of Luau, but in a different direction complete than Luau was from Cooper’s. Even from the outside the people inside looked sedate, the staff seemed efficient but bored and there was lots of room.

Upon opening the door I was greeted by the most wonderful seafood smells from the French kitchen (meaning they cook French style food.) We sat down at the bar which was separated from the restaurant proper and struck up a conversation with our bartender Christine. Christine declined to be photographed which is unfortunate as she is very attractive. We ordered our drinks, which were made with Stoli and Bombay. When I see that they use that as the well, I know that the drinks are not going to be cheap or even reasonable.

The décor is dark polished wood, black curtains, decent lighting. The kitchen is entirely open for viewing and the environment is entirely non-smoking. In fact, when we looked over in the corner there were two women knitting and having drinks. Apparently, book clubs and sewing circles meet here all of the time since it is a nice upscale place that IS non-smoking. If I could afford it, I would probably drink/eat here more often. It still seems a little pretentious though if you ask me.

Now the piece of advice I am about to impart will probably shock the owners/staff of Eva horribly if they were ever to read it, but it is something that I noticed and it is funny enough that I think everyone will read it. In the back of the restaurant down a little “maze” (two turns and short hallways) are the bathrooms. There are two separate bathrooms, each with their own lock and each male/female. What this says to me is that Eva is the perfect place for a mid meal quickie. You can individually pop down to the bathroom leaving your jackets with no fear of them walking off. Pop into the back (smaller) bathroom for your quickie. There is no fear that someone else will be waiting outside as there is not going to be a lot of a wait at a place like this and if you are discreet and just a little careful no one will be the wiser. I should say however, that my lesbian friend says that 5 minutes just ain’t enough for all of the Lesbians out there so you shouldn’t even try.

All of that being said and with the drinks costing $6 plus tax (plus tax god damn it!!) each I give Eva 3 Martini Glasses out of 5 with an extra half Martini bump for non-smokers.

-wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Average

The Jade Pagoda is quite an obviously looking red building at the north end of Broadway with a large Asian style entrance. Despite this, I have often walked past it without ever going it. I eventually took the dive and checked it out a while ago and found it to be quite an interesting little place. It is not quite a dive, but it is definitely not a midclass joint.

Walking around the corner into the lounge proper there is smallish bar with lots of seating and no amusements. There is an excellent jukebox with lots of 80s music, dim lighting from Chinese paper lanterns, and wooden Chinese style reliefs on one of the walls. The booths are black dimpled leather and additional lighting is provided by blue icicle lights above the bar itself.

Behind the bar Burt serves some nicely stiff drinks for $3. Burt is a very friendly gay man who will tell you all sorts of stories and jokes if you give him half a chance. He is a great conversationalist and I have heard many a bartender tell me that they love to go to the Jade Pagoda and have Burt serve them drinks. One of the things that Burt told us about were the things that have been stolen from the front (unsupervised) lobby. I guess a candy machine and a 400 POUND Buddha have both been stolen from the lobby. He also said something about how a row of lights in the women’s bathroom were recently stolen. How weird is that?

Happy Hour specials go till 7:00 here making their drinks even more inexpensive. Oh and if you beg, Burt will even add a little more mixer to your drink.

The Jade Pagoda is a great place for strong drinks, good onion rings, and an inexpensive price tag. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

If you are reading this, and you happen to be, or happen to know Cotton, who used to work at the El Camino, then we would be immensely happy if you would contact us. I was just at the El Camino and they had no idea how to make Camino Juice. We would very much like the recipe as we enjoyed the drink a lot.

Oh and Cotton, congrats on the new job. How does a guy get a job writing the backs for baseball cards, anyhow?

Oh, if you like, you could also just post the recipe here for all twelve of our loyal readers.

-wOOt

Now I know that parking has always been a problem in this city. In fact just about anything that has to do with a car is usually a hassle. Whether it is driving, parking, paying for gas, or flipping off the jerkwad that does not know how to use his turn signal. Pretty much my car, while I love owning it, is one of the largest stress inducers, through no fault of its own.

Driving in this city would be wonderful, if only I could put a bullet into the head of every idiot driving in front of my. I don't care if the idiots drive behind me, but they just better stay out of my way.

Now I am fortunate in that people in this city are dumb. So dumb that they miss perfectly good parking spot out in plain site. This gives me a nice warm glow inside knowing that I am getting great parking for a quarter of the aggravation and no money. I admit that it helps that I have parking karma (thanks mom.) It is very handy, I recommend that you get some.

So to sum up. I love my secret squirrel parking. I hate all other drivers. Parking and driving in this city sucks. Oh and the gas prices are too high also. But that is a rant for another day.

-wOOt

So on Monday I called Dana to let her know that I hadn’t heard from her and that I would just stop into the El Camino on Wednesday night since that is when she usually works. So Wednesday rolls around and at 11:00 or so I drop Sean off at the Ballroom and then I make my way to the El Camino. I walk up to the bartender, who is a new cute chick (since Cotton is now gone off to write the backs for baseball cards) and order a Camino Juice. She looks at me like I’m an idiot. This makes me incredibly sad that, that recipe did not change hands. Then I ask if Dana is working tonight and she says, “No. But she does usually work on Wednesday’s.” I didn’t have the heart to ask if she called in sick or is she was never working tonight. I drank my drink quietly in the corner and officially wrote her off.

Now the kicker comes the next day when I open up my mail box and I find a letter with the following return address in there.

Inside I found the following card and a note saying that is was time for spring cleaning and did I need any help. Wow fate can be cruel to kick a man in the Jimmy when he is down.

Now during the day I was talking to Sunday and I invited her out to come drinking with us, and I know that Sunday likes to drink. Thus it was arranged that we would meet up at Cooper’s in Wedgewood (really the edge of Lake City, but I think of everything in terms of their post office now.)

We met up at Cooper’s and we met Frances, a friend of Sunday’s. Now just to give you a little idea about these two women, they are tough. Sunday plays hockey (with pads and fights and everything) and Frances is a powerline worker. Great women, but I wouldn’t want to mess with either them. Now I am meeting Frances for the first time so all of this I learn over the course of the evening. Cooper’s was ok but kind of uninteresting. Oh I should mention that I am wearing my Milwaukee County Jail Shirt. I mention this because I get a bunch of comments from these older guys over at a table near ours as I walk buy them. Everyone always wants to know how I got the shirt? (I earned it) Did I buy it? (No) And then they say, “I didn’t know that they let you keep the shirt.” Why do people always gotta be so dumb. Now that I have gotten some attention over the shirt I think I am deciding not to wear it out to the bars any more.

From Cooper’s it was down and around and over and through and under and over and then right and then left to Luau’s. It was not close to where we were, but we didn’t really know the best way to get there. Luau’s is a Polynesian themed place and you could tell. When we walked in, despite it being crowded and the bar only have maybe 8 seats in total, we found 4 seats in a row unoccupied. How fortuitous was that. We ordered drinks from Tito and talked about Tequila. Despite my not so secret hope, they did not have a Scorpion Bowl either.

Let me vent here for a moment. Every time that I order something that they don’t have here and then Jason looks at me like I’m and idiot because he has already said, “we don’t have that here” is really starting to annoy me. Let pursue my little quests because I will find a place that serves duck sauce and Scorpion Bowls. I already found a place that serves Hoagies (in your face!!) Of course Zooties is run by a woman from New York. But anyway, I digress.

While we are at Luau’s I chat with Milwaukee Mike about the city and the Safe House and some random Irish pub I have never heard of. We chat with Omar the Porfidio Guy. Omar was looking to see if they had Porfidio and we had to break the news to him. There may not be any more Porfidio for another 4 years because of the crop destruction that happened a little while ago. He was as crushed as we were when we first found out. Let me give big ups to Tito again as he is master of Tequila knowledge as well. It turns out there are some good alternatives out there for much less money.

We left the women at Luau’s as they had ordered food and then we went across the street to Eva. Now Eva was the polar opposite of Luau’s. Where Luau’s was loud and excited and young and animated, Eva’s was sedate, older, freaking expensive, and the most impressive seafood smells.

Our bartender Christine was very nice and very attractive. She was cute and I felt as though she might be within my range, but perhaps just a little above it, but I think I could have managed if I was not in the Milwaukee County Jail Shirt. I also made a distinctly fatal mistake in trying to keep Christine’s attention so that I could show her I was interesting and funny. I paid the bill too soon. Once the bill was paid she knew that she did not need to dote on us anymore. An interesting side note. Apparently part of the reason we were getting some weird looks from Tito and Christine, is that word had gone out that there were two liquor board control guys out on the prowl. I guess the description is be on the lookout for two guys who come in and only order drinks. Now when you consider that I was dressed in the bright orange jail shirt and Jason was wearing it Cocktail Tiki shirt I can easily understand how we looked like two “cops” who were trying to dress the part of average drinkers. This still cracks me up.

After we left Jason and I debated about whether Christine was within my range. I said that she was, but Jason countered with that she thought that she was not within my range. Now how can I argue with that logic. I have no idea what she is thinking. But what I have to remember is that Jason is not an Engineer, he is a history major. He does not have to reason with logic. He does not deal with facts, he deals with perspectives and hearsay. He is a freaking wealth of information about the past. Just like my friend Sarah, who favorite line is, “Yes, but your dead wrong.” She would then launch into the historical “truth” of what happened.

From Eva’s it was up to Cap Hill to the Jade Pagoda, a perennial favorite of mine. Burt the bartender pours with a strong hand and you have to tell him your wussie before he will add more mixer to your drink. Jason is a wussie btw. The group talked about a lot of gay topics and as the only straight person is a group of (now) 5, I decided to just drink my drink, eat my onion rings, and watch the Return of the Jedi with subtitles which was on the screen. It was the Ewok fight and I have to say, I always secretly liked the Ewoks. I know that I shouldn’t but they symbolized the proletariat rising up against the black boot of fascism. Ok maybe I’m stretching but it was funny to watch muppets fuck with stormtroopers.

Burt did tell us a crass but funny joke,:
Q: Why did god create gay men?
A: So fat girls would have someone to dance with.

Cruel but funny.

Anyhow, we finished up our night at the Cloud Room for Sarah’s b-day party. It was a thoroughly uninteresting and non-descriptive event or me. No cute single interested women. The crowd was fairly interested in the quest, and while it was fun to talk about it, I kind of thought what was the point and decided it was time to go home.

I dropped Jason off and totally forgot to go to the Tin Hat to give a card to Mia.

-wOOt

I would like to put out a shout out to Glen who is our first Mail-In Sponsor. I just received a check today from him and it appears that we are drinking on him next.

This was an unexpected surprise but I want to say that I definately appreciate it. I would prefer it if he would fly his skinny white ass out here and sponsor us properly, but I understand the trip from DC is kind of like a small annex of hell. I should know, I visited him.

Anyhow, big ups to you Glen. We will drink well because of you.

-wOOt

The Benbow is a nautical themed restaurant and bar. For some reason, I was unable to open the back door, which led us to think that the place was closed for a moment, until Brandon, after we'd circled the building almost, went back to the first door and, well, turned the knob. I felt a bit like a monkey.

However, Brandon repaid the foolishness by not being able to find the bar, which is around a bit of a sharp turn that he missed, heading into the bowels of the building while I wisely looked for the older bartender as our guide.

And then we saw the bar.

I don't think anything could have prepared me for the place, even though Josh at the Admiral Pub had said it looked like a ship in the back. I didn't take him seriously enough. The Benbow has a bar counter with about 6 or 7 stools, all occupied, a little space next to that which appears to be for performances, or some such, a handful of table, and then the back of the bar.

It's incredible. I'm not certain if it's good, although I loved it, but it is incredible. It's modeled like the aft end of a sailing ship from the interior. There's a bank of windows, as one might see in a pirate movie, colored and lightly illuminated. There's hanging lamps, carved wooden supports of the roof, and a latticed patch on the ceiling. And okay, we weren't at the bar, and the only conversation we heard was the trashy couple seated a couple tables from us, but who cares? The ship made up for any possible flaw in the crowd, about which I can't say much.

The drinks were reasonably strong, but again, it scarcely matters. They could have been Murphy's weak, and we still would have been happy. The ship won us over completely. I think the prices were okay, but this was our fourth bar, and I wasn't paying at this place, so really, I don't recall too well.

I should mention that the waitress, who I understand is a bit of an institution, had a gigantic mass of hair that surrounded her head like a knight's helmet. It was frightening and impressive.

A quick trip to the U-District for a few bars before a party. Seems like a great idea. However, I'm not thrilled with any of them.

First up is the Excalibur Room, located in the University Plaze Hotel. The hotel has a medieval theme, and the Excalibur room featured big kingly chairs. I really like the look of the hotel, I should say, because it's one of the three positive things I'll have to say.

Now for the second one. They have snack mix in bowls on the bar, and a pretty decent snack mix.

And now the last one. The drinks were poured generously, and weren't too pricey. You might think that one was the best of all, and would outweigh my concerns about the Excalibur Room.

And yet...

The bartender was very, very slow. There were hardly any people there, but it took a long time to get our drinks, after it had taken a while to get them ordered, and later it took a while to get and pay our check. He didn't talk much, and hovered at the other end of the bar.

Why the other end of the bar? Cause that was where the other two customers were. Two. This place was rather large, but there were all of four of us in the room. In two sets of two. So the slow service becomes an even bigger problem, cause it's not like he had all that much to do. And while I like a lighter crowd, this was ridiculous.

Lastly, and not so annoying to me, there was no smoking. So we ended up knoshing a lot of the snack mix, and that was that.

So if you want a very private meeting with someone, or if you want to bring in a group and take over the place, I could recommend the Excalibur Room. If not, don't go there.

Dante's is an institition. In my younger days, I would often visit the bar, cause it had lots of pool tables, lots of college kids, and seemed to be pretty damn cool.

It's still got lots of pool tables, still has a lot of college kids. But the cool has kind of worn off.

Okay, there's not just pool tables. There's foosball tables, and air hockey, and darts, and video games, and pinball. It's sort of a one stop fun center. And the beer flows pletifully, which keeps the college kids showing up.

But we weren't there for beer, and didn't have time for air hockey, which is really too bad, cause it might have left me feeling better about Dante's.

It was rather busy for our poor bartender, and we got our drinks and then sat there and sipped, pinned in a corner. Brandon had gotten out one of our cards, cause the bartender was a bit of a hottie, and he wanted to talk to her. But she was far too busy, and I completely gave up hope of speaking to her. But finally, just as we were about to depart, she had a moment to ask if we wanted another drink.

While we didn't, we got to talk with her, and found out her name was Rhiannon, which is a lovely name to go with a lovely girl, but sadly, we had to take off cause we were already done with our drinks.

Which were, apologies to Rhiannon, really weak. I know it's a college bar, and people go there for beer, but still. They weren't at the level of Murphy's, but it wasn't a large difference. I don't think I'd go back for a mixed drink. For air hockey, sure, with a pitcher of beer, but for purposes of this quest, Dante's was kind of a bust.

Still, I hear from my just-now-turned-21 friends that the place still seemed pretty damn cool, so they're doing something right.

All through my college years, I heard about this place, how people would go there to study and drink. Since I didn't study while I was in college, there was no allure for me. I'd rather just go to a party and drink, and so I did.

Now, I finally arrived for the first time on the quest. And realized I had no idea how to enter the joint. So we circled the building, very nearly, and finally found the stairs leading down into the basement of the College Inn, wherein one might find the Pub.

I like the place, I'll say that up front. There's a fireplace, a lot of tables in several rooms. It's dim but not in a 20 watt/goth bar way, rather in a light isn't nearby but is around kind of way. The furniture is solid, heavy wooden tables and such, and there's a lot of seating, in the front, in the back, in the quiet room. There's also a lot of people, but I didn't see any of the studying I'd heard so much about. Perhaps because it was Friday night, and no one studies then.

It took a moment to get our drinks, which were about the middle range as far as priciness. Sadly, they were on the low end for strength. Not Dante's, and definitely not Murphy's, but they weren't strong enough to note in any way. Your nine year old nephew could belt would back and then ask for a double.

So while I like the look of the place, and I like descending into the bowels of the earth to get there, I don't think I can recommend it at all.

Brandon and I met Sandy from my work at the Scarlett Tree at about 2 pm. It was right in her neighborhood, and she had agreed to sponsor us for the bar that day. We were supposed to have an earlier sponsor, but it kind of fell through. Still, I thought if we found another bar nearby, Sandy might sponsor two places, cause she's cool that way.

It was midday. And a sunny one at that. Brandon and I kind of wanted to sit at their ourdoor patio, a tiny space crammed with tables, but Sandy said it was too bright. When we went to look at the patio a moment later, we agreed with her.

The Scarlett Tree is a restaurant and bar that has live music/DJs five nights a week, so there's cover there a lot on those nights. Midday, it was the haunt of a very normal crowd. The place is done in black, mostly, with a lot of wood and velvet curtains around the performance space. The service was kind of slow and kind of clumsy, but the onion rings were good, beer battered and tasty.

The drinks, however, were at best okay. And that's at best. Really, I thought they were rather weak. The third weak drink in a row, and I was starting to get a little upset.

Still, the Tree was quirky. There were hanging records in the restaurant portion of the building, and there was, for no apparent reason, a triangle with bar to ring it hanging at the bar. Quirky is nice, but doesn't make up for weak drinks that get spilled when they're being placed on the table.

Sandy agreed with some reluctance to sponsor a second bar if we could find on nearby, cause she had stuff she needed to do. She thought she was in the clear, though, cause there aren't any bars nearby, she thought. Just a couple of pubs.

We left the Scarlett Tree in search of another bar.

I'm not quite sure how to list these guys. Their name, according to the place, was the Presidio Bar and Grill, but the liquor license is listed under Cafe Presidio. So really, I'll just call them Presidio.

It's a new place, new enough that Sandy who lives about three blocks away hasn't been there. There's also a related smoke shop, which she has been too, but is uncertain of the hours of, where they also serve beer and wine. But the Presidio is supposed to be a Bar and Grill, so it had spirits.

We got there a little early. It was 3:15, and while the door was unlocked, they said they weren't open for 15 minutes. Looking at the place, you would think they weren't open for a couple more weeks, since it seems hardly done. But it is, instead, a work in progress, and not a bad one.

After killing 15 minutes at a DVD sales place, we came back to Presidio and were allowed in, although a moment later, upon asking, we were told they didn't actually open until 4, but had opened a little early cause there were customers.

The normal bartender wasn't there, so our man Jan attempted the task. Everything was still put away, so it took him a minute to get the goods out on the bar, and then he mixed the three of us as strong a batch of cocktails as your drunken uncle could wish for. While we sipped at our beveraged, we chatted across the bar with Jan, and discovered they had only opened in January, and were still working on getting up to full speed.

The Presidio has a couple of pooltables, and they have food but not yet their full menu cause they're not quite ready. They're also only open 4 pm to 1 am at present, but soon, they'll be an 11 am to 2 am place, which is good, cause they were very friendly and good people. The regular bartender, who appeared at about 3:45, fine for a 4 pm opening, was a fun person also, and allowed Jan to go back to what he was doing, which seemed to be hanging out with the owner and a couple of others in the back by the pool tables.

I like the place, and I think I'll go back, cause they treated us right. Also, it's the only decent bar in the area, so go there. And get a toothpick, even if you don't need one, cause the dispenser, featuring a bird that grabs the fancy picks in it's beak, is way cool.

Once again, Sandy sponsored, so many thanks to her for two bars in one day. The second drink was about as much as she could take, and in an almost spinny mood, she walked the two blocks past Brandon's car to her house.

We were supposed to meet Alan at the Galway Arms at 4 pm, which is good, cause they open at 4. As it turned out, hurrying over from the Presidio, we were a few minutes late, which meant that Alan had already settled in with his wonderful girlfriend Bridgit, and was waiting for us.

A very brief aside, which has nothing to do with anything. I work with Alan and Bridgit, and they are the cutest couple to walk the earth since at least the 19th century.

We ordered out drinks quickly, because the bartender was free, and then moved to a table. The Galway is an Irish pub, and has a typical Irish Pub feel. There's a lot of wood, a lot of various Irish drink related memorabilia, that sort of thing. But they have good drinks, as we discovered when the bartender brought them. And their fish and chips basket was excellent, the fish tasty, the tartar full of dill, the fries seasoned. We chatted about the previous bars while I ate, and Alan, who was our sponsor for the Galway, asked if there was anywhere else nearby he could sponsor us at.

I said the Irish Immigrant across the street, but then Bridgit jumped in and said she was getting that one, and Alan just smiled. They're so cute.

The Galway's a nice Irish pub, but we had time constraints, since we had to be at the U Bookstore by 5, so we hurried on to the Immigrant across the street.

I've been here for after dinner drinks, for pre-Paragon show drinks, for meetings and for a 30th Birthday Wake. It's odd that I've been to the Immigrant so much and never bothered to cross the street to the Galway until this quest. But then, that's one of the things this quest is about.

The Immigrant is a large Irish pub. There's a rather large lower floor, with a non-smoking section, and there's an upper floor that's roughly half the size of the lower floor. Once again, there's a lot of wood, and there's a big, big TV on the lower floor that gets moved aside when they have entertainment, bands and Irish music and suchlike. There's a lot of space, especially in the middle of the day, on a Sunday, so we got a big booth for just the four of us.

The bartender had to see all of our IDs, foiling Bridgit's attempt to get our drinks at the bar, but he came out after just a moment and took our orders. He was very pleasant, and returned with a good amount of haste with our drinks. Which was good, cause time was running out. While food was considered, because they have a most excellent artichoke parmesan dip with tortilla chips, we weren't really in any position to take the time.

Brandon and I drank our fully acceptable drinks quickly, but even in the few moments we were there, the bartender came over to check and see if we were alright. During previous visits, I've noted the same level of attentiveness from the staff, crowd permitting, and I like that a lot. However, we had no time, so we said we were fine, and bidding adieu to Alan and Bridgit, who were staying to finish off their Harp and hard cider on tap, respectively, we moved on.

Big ups to Bridgit for sponsoring out of the blue, and also to Alan again for picking up the Galway Arms.

LeeAnne from the bookstore had promised to pick up the Waterwheel, pretty much the last bar in the Crown Hill area of north Ballard that we had to pick up. That very same Sunday as we went out with Sandy, then Alan and Bridgit, was to be the day.

So we picked her up at the bookstore after it closed, at 5, and drove over to Ballard, and to the Waterwheel, which is announced by a sign that looks like it was made by a 9 year old with a very simple program, featuring a cheeseburger, a martini and the name on a white background.

Inside, the sun shining past the bath-towel curtains (nice sets, mind you, and matching for each window), there were a half-dozen older customers, and the oldest of them all, the bartender, who had to be at or beyond retirement age. He still had pep, though, and got us our drinks with haste. They were pretty strong, but by this time, what did that matter? It was bar five, and we were reasonably happy, me more than Brandon. Still, the drinks were of a good quality, and the bar provided entertainment aplenty.

The promise of Taco night, and of free but random food on Wednesday nights, was exciting. The towels attracted attention. The very smallness and oldness of the bar (and crowd) was interesting. It seemed oddly like the sort of place one should visit early and often, and everyone should at least go there once. It's an experience.

The drinks are pretty strong, and pretty cheap, so there's nothing wrong there. The crowd seems friendly, as is so often the case in a bar that seems to have regulars. Quite the opposite of what I would have once believed.

LeeAnne picked up her sponsorship props with the Waterwheel, and I have to say it was an excellent choice.

So I haven't posted a journal entry in a while, and now I'm going to, cause I'm mostly caught up on the bars. At least, I'm less than 10 behind.

I work at the University Bookstore. It's not the best job ever, cause I could, like most people, use more money. And it's kind of repititious, but after four years, there are very few jobs that aren't. On occasion, things happen that I feel are stupid, but it's a job, so that happens.

What I love about the job, and what keeps me there, are the people.

I love my coworkers.

I'm a cashier. We're an odd lot, at best, and right now, we're at the oddest we've ever been. A little crazy, every one of us, together we're almost totally insane. And it spreads a lot over the rest of the books department.

But that has little to do with this quest, so I'll get to the good bits.

My coworkers, when presented with this quest, pretty much just said cool. Security Steve paused for a moment to try to figure out how many bars he'd been to in Seattle, but then had to give up, guessing the number to be at least 100, but he wasn't sure, cause he went to bars all over the area. Well, at least in Seattle we're giving him a run for his money.

The cashiers get regular updates, and they seem to at least think they're funny. Alan and Sandy have sponsored me, and Kathryn/K-Dogg comes out to take pictures whenever we think to call her. Jon's getting jealous of my sudden seeming immunity to hangovers. LeeAnne has picked up a bar, and Annie from the customer service desk says she's going to. I'm under the impression a lot of them at least glance at the site from time to time.

So I love these people.

But I better have a doctor's note ready if I ever call in sick again.

This site seemed to me to be about posting, when and as we could, what we did. So that's what I do, and I leave it as that. I've even, sadly, left Dina's name as Nina in the Village Pub post, cause that's what I wrote. I apologized for it, but that's what I wrote.

Brandon, on the other hand, edits the site to fit reality. I don't approve, but he has a good reason.

Those of you who read often may note that his posts just show up, after my posts in time, but before in their placement. That's cause Brandon edits his posting dates. This bugs me for reasons I can't even fully express, mostly having to do with accuracy and reality, but then, he has a very good reason for doing otherwise.

My method could leave you thinking we went to all the bars from Benbow to the Waterwheel in a single night, cause that's when I posted them. Even if you can get from the messages that it wasn't the case, and I think you can, it's still unclear that the Benbow was the last bar of Friday the 26th, the three U-District bars were on Saturday the 27th, and the other 5 on Sunday the 28th. Brandon's method lets you click on the day after the bars, and actually read what we did the night before, or the night of. Which is handy, and I can see the value. But I don't really like it, anyway.

He's telling you all a story, though. The story of this quest. You should read it, cause he's doing a better job than I am. But then, he's looking to make an actual story out of it, while I'm just looking to be inspired by it, so he's got more reason.

Still, I don't like it much.

Saturday we're leaving a party after being at the Excalibur/Dante's/the College Inn Pub, and there's this guy taking a picture of these dead-looking trees.

For some reason, keep in mind I'm not near to sober, I walked up to him and asked him some question about his photo. Something about the trees being dead. He said they weren't dead. I said something about them just being seriously pruned, that he was right. And while I was saying that, he took his picture, and then, very quickly, grabbed up his camera with tripod and hurried away.

Am I a scary drunk?

I guess I must be. But then, it was 47th and 11th, at midnight, so anyone would be...

Type: Nightspot
Class: Trendy

In many ways I must say that my fascination with Martini Glasses came from my visits to this place. I admit that I have always thought that the Martini Glass was an excellent looking contraption (even if a little difficult to drink from) for Marcus’ brings the glass to a new level. Marcus’ drink list is as long as the wait to actually get one. And let me tell you that can be a long process indeed. Each drink takes anywhere from 30 seconds to about 2 minutes to make, depending on how many times they have to shake, pour, twirl, or otherwise jostle the alcohol. Combine this with a line and it can get out of hand. Their drinks, which are the best reason to go here, are all phenomenal though and if you are willing to shell out the $6 to $10 (average $8) per drink than this is your place. The prices are a mixture of quality, quantity, and location (it is Pioneer Square and you are getting almost pure alcohol most times.)

As for the Heaven itself, Marcus’ is located off of Pioneer Square kind of surreptitiously hidden by the enormous Taco Del Mar above it. If you are not keeping a close eye out, you could easily miss the door that leads down and the faded Martini glass painted on the front window. Walking down into this basement bar gives the feeling that it is an exclusive place where all of trendy people go. Well at least half of that is true.

Marcus’ is very dimly lit. Supplemental light is provided by Martini Glasses filled with wax candles and a layer of some dark liquid at the bottom of the glass. They are quite excellent looking as long as you remember to occasionally dump out the extra wax.

The crowd here is always young. On Friday and Saturday nights after about 9:00 or so, the place gets so crowded that after spending 20 minutes in line for a drink you better go two fisted and don’t leave your card. You will have to stand in line again to get it back, trust me. Marcus’ always has a local artist’s work hanging but it usually clashes with the large fish tank at one end of the bar.

Now Marcus’s real notoriety (at least in my book) comes from the fire spitting bar tenders. I talked with Kimberly briefly, but while she was totally uninterested in our quest (too jaded from working here) she was happy to tell about how she can’t fire spit in public. I guess at home she can do it just fine, but she doesn’t like to spit for audience. Funny I think that you can get paid big bucks for doing that in the right place. Anyhow, they set up glasses with shots of flaming Dr. Pepper and then the bartender breathes flame across them setting them on fire. It is quite impressive.

Now while I like Marcus’ I do think their prices are a bit on the exorbitant side but for a great night out it is a pretty good place provided you can score yourself a booth and then protect with a large meaty fist from the many sharks that are ready to pounce at any moment. I give Marcus’ 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

Right next door to Marcus’ we stopped into Trattoria Mitchelli because it was convenient and they almost certainly still had food at this hour. The place is cheerfully decorated in the red and white of your standard family Italian restaurant. At one end of this enormous restaurant is a wood fired pizza kitchen with the bar proper. In the center is a large eating area and at the far end, where we sat, was an enormous U shaped eating counter that we mistook for a bar. On the wall next to the bar hangs a huge poster of Chair Made of Ham (pictured above.)

The Trattoria had lovely smells, daily counter specials of some good looking pasta, and a picture of a chair made of ham. Figure that one out. The swivel chairs are round with a back and red seat cushions. A large display case showed individually wrapped slices of cakes and pies. It is late so I imagine that it wasn’t quite fresh anymore, thus the plastic wrap. Soft music played in the background.

Jason and I talked to Faith our bartender for a little while but she kept disappearing on us. Jason ordered Bruchetta and while the bread was adequate, the toppings were very tasty. I hope that the food overall is better than the Bruchetta because thinking back on it, I liked it mostly because I was hungry rather than because it was particularly good. The slices were large and thin. I really like mine to be nice meaty slices with some spring to them.

All in all it is not a bar and the drinks were priced at $3.50 for a well and $6.50 (plus tax on both) for specialty drink (my Key Lime Pie was tasty) puts the drinks as exceptionally reasonable for Pioneer Square. I recommend popping in here to a quick start up and then moving on to the higher priced Marcus’ next door. I give the Trattoria Mitchelli 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

All I can say about Elliott’s is wow. This place is truly amazing, if you can afford it. Now let me start by saying that the drinks are $4 plus tax which is quite reasonable. So if you are going for just drinks then you all set. If you are going for food, expect to pay a pretty penny, as this is tourist central. Now I recommend that you go in and sit at the bar. Keep a look out for a Xander looking guy working behind the bar by the name of Ethan. If he is there you treat him well. Ethan is a great guy and will treat you well if you return the favor (you know what I mean.)

The bar itself is a huge affair stretching at least 15 people down. Strangely this length is still less than a 3rd of the total Restaurant length. The bar is polished light wood and shiny brass touches. The chairs are comfy and the liquor selection is just impressive. There are 3 racks of booze behind the bar with surplus bottles above, additional bottles below, and these cool Finlandia Pasta Jars up on a high shelf to the far left.

We chatted with Ethan for quite a while as the strength of his drink mixed with my previous killer drinks (in strength) were hitting me enough that I wanted to sit for a while. Now in the spirit of full disclosure, after we had been there for at least a half hour chatting Ethan announced that he was comping us Oyster shooters in honor of our quest. This was totally unexpected and we really appreciated it. In fact I still do. The oysters were Totten Inlet and placed in a mixture of pepper vodka and a Bloody Mary mix.

I really liked mine. Jason had some difficulty. He had never done a shooter and lets just say, that for more details check out the journal entry for this day (Cuatro de Mayo.)

So when it all came down to it, Elliott’s was flawless. They are a great looking place. They have a view of the water and a huge outside deck where you can sit and have cocktails or food in the summer. There are lots of tourists who come through here so if you work it right you could score some out of town tail. The drinks are strong and well priced and finally the staff is amazing. I give Elliott’s the ever-elusive 5 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

So I see that Jason has said his peace on this matter. I am fine with that. At first I was annoyed that he would even bother. I mean why point out that I edit my posting dates. What does that really accomplish? Nothing in my opinion, but it annoys me nonetheless. Do our fine readers really need to care about when we actually post our journal entries and reviews?

As far as I am concerned we are only using this whole Weblog format because it is convient. Now if this were a live journal I could see that our lovely readers might get upset that we were editing reality, but it isn't, as has been pointed out to me on a number of occasions.

Now as I said, I am not nearly as annoyed now as this post might seem to indicate. You see, what it comes down to is that Jason and I have very different views on this quest, on posting, and the mere concept of "reality." He has this bizarre notion of keeping to "the truth," despite the fact that he is almost exclusively a fiction writer (by "trade"). As for me, I am a journalistic writer by "trade" (not an actual journalist mind you). I belive that the story should flow and that it should not leave the reader confused and wondering how the hell we ended up in the Admiral District when the last post seemed to come from the ID and before that we were in Ballard. My concern is for the reader, not the truth of when I posted my account. No one really cares WHEN I posted my things, only when it was posted for.

So, what it comes down to is this. Since Jason and I have fairly similar opinions on too many places, there needs to be something that seperates us and this may need to be it. I will continue to "edit reality" as I see fit, in order to keep the reader enganged and entertained. I will at no point lie (knowingly) or embelish with falsehoods. I might focus on something that wasn't nearly as important in the moment, or lead my readers in a particular direction. I have even pulled several of my own early posts from this site as I deemed them inappropriate, annoying or perhaps unneccessarily damaging to my currently non-existant lovelife. I reserve this right and while I will not edit my co-authors or my commenters, I will edit myself.

What you see here is the true story of what happens to us on our quest as we visit each Spirits Serving Establishment in Seattle. Everything else is mutable and I do it all for you, our readers.

-wOOt

I would like us all to take a small moment of silence to mourn the passing of a bar 570BARS has visited. I will take this moment to say a few kind words about Rain Dancer for it is no more.

I must admit that I did not know Rain Dancer well. I saw one show there and met two cute college women who never emailed, even after I gave them a ride to pick up their ID. I had a decent drink and I liked the performance space.

Rain Dancer, I wish I could say that you will be missed, but really, you won't, or at least not by me.

I give you this special place in our history though, as you are the first bar to have died while under our tender care.

Now if only I could inflict your fate on a few key others, I might be happy.

-wOOt

The Pig and Whistle is a restaurant that becomes a bar late in the day, and it was the first bar of the Greenwood area in a night that was meant to have 4 bars. We couldn't find room for the four of us (Brandon, me, Sean, Wolf) at the bar, so we got a table, where a haughty waitress came by and took our order eventually, and got us our drinks rather quickly after that.

The place looks like a decent looking restaurant, with some interesting art of some sort of modernist style hanging about, and a massive Dido, Queen of Carthage over the bar itself, hanging precariously on wires at an angle. There's a pool table in back, which makes it obvious that it's a bar at all times even when the full menu is on offer, since only space seperates the main seating from the pool, and not even a great amount of space. It's actually a pretty attractive locale.

That said, the service wasn't at top speed, the drinks were only okay, and the prices weren't the best, although I'm not bothered so much by the last, as Wolf once again stepped up to sponsor us. I think I'm running out of words of praise for my brother by this time, so I'll just say it was very nice of him.

Brandon went to talk to the bartender for a bit, explaining the quest to someone who might be interested, as it was obvious that our waitress was not all about paying much attention to people. And while he was there, a disturbing trend developed.

A table over from us, against the wall, two women were talking and eating fries. One of them had already revealed herself as easily amused, laughing quite often. But while Brandon was gone, she began to laugh alarmingly, laughs so long and cacklicious that one began to grow somewhat afraid for her safety and the sanity of others. For a time, after everything we said she burst into new gales of laughter, just because she was laughing that often. And she was also a somewhat larger woman, so that she was a big, jolly, laughing person, a scary type to have at the next table.

When Brandon came back, we got the check and paid, and the laughing woman just kept on chortling at everything that her companion said, and when we left, they were still at it. Disturbing.

She's got hair whipped up high over her head, and she can't be less than 55, probably a bit more. Her name is Dodie, and she pours a mean drink.

The Baranhof is an old nautical themed restaurant, the sort of place with nets and blue waves on the walls and such. The cash register, unless I'm mistaken, was made sometime before I was even a twinkle in my father's eye. The lunch counter stools are the most uncomfortable things I've ever sat on. And I'm not even to the bar yet.

Which is in the back, and is pretty dark. The clientele was mixed, ranging from a few old guys who had perhaps been in the same stool when the "new" cash register arrived, to three college kids at the table next to us. When we arrived, there wasn't a bartender in sight, but a few moments later, Dodie arrived, hair visible first like the sails of a ship over the horizon.

To say she had a strong pour would be to give a strong pour too much credit. My drink, a vodka cranberry as is typical, arrived with a faint blush to the fluid. Picture if you will a caucasian who's been out in 45 degree weather, and the faint pinkish hue you might expect to see on exposed flesh. Very faint. That was my drink. For the gin and tonic crowd, I think squeezing their wedge of lime just about doubled the amount of mixer in the drink.

My first sip inspired a pause and an exhalation in the "smoooooth" fashion. Because this was no ordinary mixed drink, this was a special and powerful mixed beverage, the sort which assured me that we would not be hitting 4 bars tonight, and would perhaps be lucky to hit as many as 3. When Wolf decided to follow my advice to Brandon, and just chug his drink to get it over with, I was shocked. When I did the same a moment later, I was stunned, mostly by the amount of alcohol I had just consumed. And when Brandon went crazy and finished his off, against my gasped warnings, I knew all of us had gone a little bit bug-fuck crazy.

Wolf expresses it best, just before the mass consumption, by saying, "I think I can hear the ice crying."

So if you're looking for the strongest drinnk we've had, and I think the strongest drink short of a double shot that it's possible to have, you should think about checking out the Baranhof. Just look for Dodie, and if you see this high mass of grey, you've got the right bar. But be warned, the crying ice might bring you down.

Tonight is Nihil’s b-day outing to Marcus’ and then a bunch of place we have already been. Nihil is a ministry guy and while I don’t really know him I do like most of the rest of the crew and we knew that Marcus’ would be a free pickup at some point since our crew loves to go out there.

The crew in total was Me, Jason, Wolf, Sean, Nihil, Big John, Fulcrum, Bizket, Safety Monkey, Julie, and Dick (who is notable as being the first person to post on our forums.) Getting there at 9:00 was the way to go as we were able to still get booths (which are in short supply) and walk up to the bar to get our drinks, rather than standing in line for 15 minutes to order a drink that takes 3 minutes to make.

There was much talk of David Lynch films. Fulcrum loves them all and thinks they are genius. Jason has not seen most of them as he has heard that they are mostly crap and just to bizarre. For myself, I enjoy a David Lynch film even if it takes me a while to figure out what the fuck is actually going on. Of course Fulcrum is also the guy who thinks that Requiem for a Dream is one of the most genius movies ever made. Let me just say that if you are watch that movie and the word WINTER appears on the screen. Just turn off the movie and tell yourself that they all live happily ever after. Trust me. On a more bizarre note, Fulcrum confirmed for us that they were in deed making a sequel to “Dude, Where is my Car” (a surprisingly funny movie.) It would be called, “Seriously Dude, Where is My Car?”

During our time here Bizket tells me that he is thinking about starting a sister quest to drink in every bar in Tacoma. I think that is a great idea. I would love to see these quests pop up all over the nation. They could become like fight clubs. It could be fun. We could end up being the fathers of modern alcoholism. Now that would be something, wouldn’t it?

At Marcus’ one of the things that they are known for is the flaming Doctor Pepper. They set up shots on overturned glasses and put a beer in front of each one. The bartender takes a mouthful of flammable liquid and lights a paper towel. He then breathes the liquid out setting it on fire and then lights the drinks. You drop the shots in the beer and drink it all up. It is actually quite amazing to watch.

Since the crew were going to the Cloud Room and then Barca/Bad JuJu, Jason and I decided to peel off and hit a couple of other places down town. We stopped in the Trattoria Mitchelli next door. Nice place, good food, and Faith was friendly. We weren’t sure if they served booze and asked Faith if they did. She said, “We would go out of business if not them [booze.]” Jason and I pretty much just read papers while we were in there. There was little to entertain us with and Faith did not really hang around to chat much, even after our spiel. Faith is the first bartender though to have brought up the Stranger article that started it all, before we showed her our card or told her about our quest. Nice place, kind of dull. Faith did direct us down to Elliot’s and for that I will always be grateful.

We down the dock to Elliot’s after Mitchelli’s. This place is huge and we met Ethan here. Ethan is the man. He totally loved our idea and after the fairly strong drinks we had I kind of needed to sit for a little while to nurse my G&T before driving home. We chatted with Ethan for probably an hour. Oh, I should say, that Jason and I have also come up with a new card giving policy. If the bartender is female and cute, I give the card. If they are male and cute, Jason gives the card. Finally is they unattractive then it flip flops. This way in case there is actually a contact, it will go to the “right” person. I think that it is a good idea. Ethan looked kind of like Xander (from Buffy) so Jason gave him a card.

Elliot’s I decided would be Glen’s first official Sponsorship, since I had his $10 and it was a nice place with a good beer selection. We talked about a bunch of stuff with Ethan and we gave him the spiel and talked about places he goes and liquor license violations and weird shit like that. After about 45 minutes, Ethan comped us an oyster shooter each. Man I love that. Strangely it is not the free stuff that I love so much as the recognition that we are cool guys on an interesting quest and that people recognize that. Ethan pointed out that the shooter would be Totten Inlet oysters with Pepper Vodka and some sort of red paste (I can’t think of what it was.) I really like it.

Now while Jason liked it, it was actually kind of disturbing watching him try to eat it. I guess he has a problem taking pills, so it was (in retrospect) no surprise that he couldn’t just down the shooter. Instead he shot it and then immediately had to spit it back into the glass. Then he tried again, and start to chew (like I told him he should.) He looked like he was going to hurl a couple of time, but eventually managed to get it down with no mishaps. I was thankful, cause that would have been embarrassing.

Eventually it was time to head home. We thought about hooking back up with the crew, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do so.

As we walked back to the car, it seemed to be way farther out than it was in. I think that is because on the pier, there are no blocks, so there is no demarcation of time or distance. When we were walking down 2nd, it was probably 6 to 8 blocks and that felt a lot longer than what we walked to get there.

All in All, it was a very good night.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar
Class: Upscale

Roy’s Seattle is the hotel bar in the Westin Hotel. Upon first glance it is a very nice space. It is in the lobby of the Westin and is mostly just a place to sit and listen to the piano player. The bar is located next to the glass looking out onto 5th Avenue. There are nice hanging lights, a Formica looking bartop and polished wood. The waiter has a little hotel staff uniform and was wearing a nametag that said Bobby.

We sat down and ordered our drinks. Bobby proceeded to measure our shots of Stoli and Beefeater with a shot pour (to the rim and no extra). I don’t think he washed it in between but I can’t be sure. The drinks were exactly average and for $6.50 plus tax they shouldn’t have been. Now really this would not have been such a big deal if not for what happened 5 minutes later. We are sitting there determinedly eating a whole bowl of their fairly good bar mix when he walks up in front of us and straight pours a whiskey and coke for the guy at the far end of the bar. Now I can’t say if they other guy got a drop more booze than we did, but all I can say is bad form.

Other than these small facts there was really little of interest to say about this place. Despite my the foul taste in my mouth over the “drink pouring incident” I will begrudgingly give them 1 and half Martini Glasses out of 5 in recognition of the piano player and the bar mix.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

The Palace Kitchen is a very attractive establishment. It was a huge dark wood u shaped bar, a large open kitchen, kitsch chandeliers and lots of interesting touches. These are things like a white tiled bar top, metal studded walls, modern art in the bathroom, a large Renaissance style painting and hanging curtains. It is probably a great date place and would definitely impress her. They had lots of frying pans hanging in a row, which is a good sign for a high-end kitchen.

The drink itself was a weak pour and for $5.50 I expect more, even if it isn’t bottom of the barrel. The bartenders seemed distant but were jovial with each other. I definitely got the feeling that since we weren’t eating we really weren’t worth their time.

So in summary, it is an attractive place with over priced drinks, and some excellent food smells. I give the Palace Kitchen 2 Martini Glasses out of 5 since it definitely wasn’t as craptastic as Roy’s but it has a hell of a ways to go.

-wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Upscale

The Nara Grill is located right across the street from the Cinerama so if you are standing in line for Episode 2, The Two Towers, or any other big movie event, I recommend popping over here for a quick drink. Walking in you are greeted by a large fish tank, several curved glass walls, and a mellow environment. The lighting is good and the décor is attractive.

The bar itself is a medium sized affair with a fountain at one end and a large wine rack at the other. The stools are comfy and the plates of bar mix are both attractive and “high end.” Now when I say high end, I am talking about Doritos and Fritos, which for bar mix is pretty good.

Our bartendress, Monica, was tall, lanky, and quite attractive. When we got there she seemed quite dazed and was either completely ditzy or just going through the motions. It turns out that she is in fact quite interesting once you perk up her attention. We introduced ourselves and explained our quest. I asked about her accent and she explained that is from South Africa. She also explained that it had been dead all day (it being Cinco de Mayo and them being a Japanese Grill.) We didn’t get much more conversation than that but she at least made me doubt my initial impression.

Off to the side are a number of small tables for couples having drinks. Past the bar is the restaurant itself. The Nara Grill is apparently a high end Beni-hana. Every table has its own grill as well as there being what looked like a sushi bar, but I’m not sure. There is a second level for private groups and the theme was distinctly Japanese all around. All of their furnishings were high-end reproductions or authentic antiques, but who am I to say.

Our drinks were $4.50 and were average strength but after the reaming we had just taken at the Westin and the Palace Kitchen it was a nice change. Monica also brought us tall glasses of water without any prompting. I really like that, especially when it is bar 3 of the night.

The Nara Grill is a nice and reasonable place to come and have a drink. I give it 3 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Trendy

The I-Spy is a music venue, plain and simple. It has a large stage, two primary levels and virtually no décor that wasn’t pinned there. The entire place is painted black for easy clean up and all of the seating consists of plastic tables and chairs and wooden shelf around the edge. The cover can range anywhere from $8 to $15 (but these aren’t hard and fast figures.)

If you can get a table and a couple of chairs and you are willing to stay there then this venue can be pretty good. Of course you can also stand by the stage and be spit on by the performers. I didn’t actually see this happen but I image if you want them to sweat on you, it shouldn’t be too hard.

There are two bars upstairs and downstairs, but the upstairs bar was not open and that made life hell for getting a drink. The drinks were $4 and your typical crappy nightclub drinks. I suspect they do this because they know you are not there for the booze. Plus you are a captive audience, just like at a ball game or the theatre.

Now here is the strange thing. The I-Spy also has a poorly marked 3rd floor. The 3rd floor mind as well be its own place and I would easily go there regularly if I didn’t have to pay cover to her in there. No maybe there is a way to just go up there, but I don’t think so. The décor there is nice, the area is sedate, they have their own live music and an attractive bar to boot. The kitchen is upstairs and I would love to come up here and listen to some live music, eat a plate of nachos and order a drink or two. I just don’t want to have to deal with the I-Spy proper.

When we were there, we saw 3 bands: Degenerate Art Ensemble, Circus Contraption, and Sleepytime Guerilla Museum. To sum up. DAE had a good sound their purposeful discordant sound was jarring and annoying. Circus Contraption was amazing and I even paid the $12 to buy their self produced album. SGM was crap. Lots of people really love them, but they are crap never the less. I do give mad freakin props to their percussionist though who has some mad skillz with a rolling keg or whatever else he has handy.

All of that being said, I give the I-Spy 1 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5, but I give the upstairs 3 Martini Glasses out of 5. It would get more if I could get in there separately.

-wOOt

I keep forgetting that today is Cinco de Mayo. I will remember and then immediately get distracted by something more important (like a good song comes on the radio.) We should probably do something vaguely Cinco De Mayo esque but since we are going to the I-Spy instead, I doubt that is going to happen.

The day started with a burst of productivity that forced all other plans to the curb. I had hoped to go and develop some photos but the idea of dressing and driving and developing was just too much. I want to say that the guilt or being so far behind in my reviews forced me to press forward. That would be lie though. I can write reveiws while listening to 89.5, sitting in scivvies and taking frequent breaks of nonproductivity. That being said I think I got mostly caught up.

At about 8:15 I picked up Jason and we headed over to the I-Spy for a 9:00 show. Now I have gotten burned on this whole 9:00 at the I-Spy before, but for some reason I forgot until we arrived and there were 3 people standing outside and the place was distinctly closed. So it was off to the Westin.

Well that was a mistake. It all started off well enough with a sprawling lobby bar, a pianist (yeah, he said pianist), and high end bar mix. It went seriously downhill from there. The drinks were $6.50 + tax (Beefeater and Stoli) and they were not worthy to hold the 727's drink's soiled jock strap.

Now I realize that this is petty, but Jason and I made a point to eat a whole bowl of the bar mix. We were going to get our money's worth if we had to take out of the bartender's hide. The final nail in the coffin was thus: When Bobby (according to his name tag) poured our drinks, he filled the shot to the brim and not a drop more. Then 5 minutes later he poured a whiskey and coke without the shot for a guy down the bar while standing right in front of us. What is he new? We left in a hurry after leaving a 8% tip. I didn't really want to leave that, but there is no need to make him pay the government.

From there it was to the Palace Kitchen. Oh look, another good looking place with overpriced weak assed drinks. We drank, we split. Fairly unmemorable all around (except that wallet felt unfortunately lighter yet again.) Across the street we went to a sure fire success, the Nara Grill. We were not dissapointed.

The Nara Grill is a Benihana kind of place and the bar is an elegant affair with a lanky South African hottie tending it. She was kind of out it for most of the evening, but I suspect that she could be a lot of fun. In addition to Monica, there were two guys next to us talking about Mexico. They obviously had just met and were comparing their experiences. There was lots of talk about Vicente Fox and his policies and govenment. Every NPR bone in my body wanted to get involved but I resisted. An interesting thing they brought up is that apparantly there are Mexican Jews. I had no idea.

So finally we make it to the I-Spy. We saw 3 bands: Degenerate Art Ensemble, Circus Contraption, and Sleepytime Guerilla Museum. While I like Sam's other band, DAE was a little too Avant Guarde for me. Circus Contraption was the bomb, and the SGM was just well, you know. Heck of a percussionist though.

At I-Spy we met up with Allegra and a bunch of people known collectively as the Vegas crew. I will sum up my experience of the night with the following pre-rant. I think everyone should be forced to wear a name tag that says either: "I'm with ...." or "I'm Seattle Straight." I spent almost the entire evening waiting for each of the women to say the word boyfriend or kid or husband. All 3 were said by someone and it just annoying. I hate to expend the effort getting to know non-single people who I will never see again.

Circus Contraption was worth the $8 we paid to get in, but otherwise the night ws well ... OK. Also, my condolences go out to a friend who was there that had a terrible evening due to some unfortunate news she recieved shortly before arriving.

And when it was all said and done, we did absolutely nothing Cinco de Mayo related.

-wOOt

After Baranhof's, it was kind of amazing that we could make it across the street, but we did. And once there, we arrived at the China Jade Restaurant, where the bar was mostly empty and the crowd was mostly dead. But appearances decieved. Once we had ordered our drinks, we started chatting with the bartender, a guy in his fifties, maybe, named Mike. He was a character, but in a good way. Danced to his own music, made weird asides, but he made a good drink, and he was quick with the pulltabs when we decided to play, so that was good.

The place is a Chinese restaurant bar, of course, so there's not much to say. Tables, pull tabs, a weird Chinese guy playing the touch-screen video game at the bar. They apparently have a guy come in and set up his keyboard on a fake piano in the corner, and then play, every week. He used to do it at other bars, and is pretty well known, I gather.

We learned about him from Bob, who was on the next stool over, and works at 13 Coins downtown. So we'll probably run into Bob again, cause that's how these things seem to happen.

The China Jade didn't leave much of an impression. However, this wasn't the bar's fault. It was that ice-weeping drink back at Baranhof, which left me a little lost for the next couple of hours. Still, I liked the place and the people were friendly, which are both good signs, even if I can't recall what exactly the decor was.

Sadly, I have discovered the fate of Porfidio.

While the crop was greatly decreased, this didn't kill that fine, fine tequila. Rather, it disappeared from the USA because of this.

This is taken from the excellent site for Tequila Aficionado Magazine. Check it our for all your tequila needs and news.

So, Omar and all other Porfidio fans, there will be no Porfidio until we get a change in Mexican government policy. Which just sucks.

We went to Cooper's to meet my friend Sunday, who is the a great person, and who I need to spend more time with. Fortunately, she and her friend Frances ended up coming to all four bars with us tonight, so we did get a chance to hang out.

Cooper's, I'm told, used to be a local watering hole before it changed owners. I could tell there was something about the place, because it was pretty much a nice sports bar, with a younger crowd, but then all the tables nearest the big screen TV were occupied by older guys who were watching the Mariner's game. So I'm guessing the old guys were the last holdouts of the bar that was, while the rest of the crew was more the bar that is. However, other than that bit of evidence, I can't say if the place has actually changed, cause I've never been there before.

Whatever the case, it seems like a perfectly servicable sports bar. There's a lot of TVs, there's a pool table, there's dart boards of the steel tip variety. There's a scattering of tables, and a long bar that was still pretty much full, which I think is a good sign for the liveliness of a bar, whether they can fill their counter. The food is good, I've been told by a lot of people, but we didn't have any, cause this was to be just the first stop. The drinks were pretty strong, but not in the top ten.

We sat and chatted for a while as we drank, and then decided that Sunday and Frances would come with us to another bar, Luau, down by Greenlake, and we'd see what happened from there. So, without any more to say about Cooper's, we departed.

Luau is a Polynesian themed restaurant, and it is evidentally very popular. The crowd was dense, in both the restaurant portion and in the bar itself, where a large group, equipped with their own leis, had taken over half the bar. However, despite the large crowds, there were four seats available at the bar in a row, and so we all got seated without a problem.

Our bartender was Tito, a cool guy who was perhaps the hardest working bartender we've seen. He was making drinks in large quantities, cleaning up, taking money, running cards, and still had some time to talk to us and to recommend tequilas.

The place is a treasure of tiki goodness. From masks on the walls to a surfboard to hula girls and picture postcards, the bar area is crowded with appropriate stuff. The larger and specialty drinks come in big gourd-like goblets, and you can get an iced bucket of Coronitas, little 7 oz Coronas.

The drinks were fine, but I especially like and recommend the Wasabi Mary, which Sunday ordered based on the fact that pretty much all of us wanted a taste. Their food was attractively presented, and pretty tasty, too.

Tito and the other bartender, Tony, should get some sort of award for how hard they were working, but Tito seemed to be having a great time, and everyone at the bar was enjoying the place, too.

We met a couple more people, and I make note of Omar, who wanted to get a shot of Porfidio, but was sadly disappointed, cause there is no such fine, fine tequila within our country anymore, for reasons detailed elsewhere on this site.

We told Tito we were going across the street to Eva, and he said it was a totally different place. Little did we know how right he was. Leaving Sunday and Frances behind to finish their larger drinks, we headed over to Eva.

A fancy place, Eva is really a restaurant where you can get a drink at their nice bar. The drinks, however, aren't cheap, cause the place isn't cheap. But they were pretty strong, and the food at the place looked good on paper, and smelled great in the air, so I guess they can charge what they do, cause it seemed worth it. However, for just the drink we had, it was a bit much, even if they were decently strong.

Our bartender Christine was nice enough, although at first she thought we were secret Washington State Liquor Control Agents, which was pretty funny, considering we're perhaps the opposite, although armed with the same list.

It was a very nice looking place, and the maze-like walk to the bathrooms was oddly pleasing. I took a look in their walk-in just for old times sake, and was rewarded with the same familiar cool air and vaguely disgusting smells as any such refrigerator always provides. Old home night for this former HFS worker.

Nothing much more to report. A good place to take a date, if you've got the money, and if you want a drink after, there's Luau across the street.

Burt tells me wussies can't get drinks at his bar. Burt is the Jade Pagoda's alcohol alchemist, and he mixes a potent potion. I've asked for a little bit of extra cranberry, cause at four bars, I'm pretty much knowing I'm in trouble, but we still have one more stop, a birthday gathering, and I don't want to be too tipsiliated. Finally, he caves in and gets me a little extra cranberry, and I'm very happy.

The Jade Pagoda Lounge is a divey sort of bar attached to a Chinese restaurant which was closed by the time we arrived. The drinks are, as noted, terribly strong, the second strongest after Baranhof that I've had. The clientele was quiet, by and large, and the biggest entertainment was Burt himself, who was a bartender with good attitude. He made us up some onion rings though, so who can complain? They were pretty good, but then, I was kind of tipsy by then, as I've mentioned. The ladies having only just barely joined us at Eva, just as we were leaving, have now returned to our side for the Jade Pagoda, and we all have a pretty good time in this very reasonably priced, very strongly pouring bar before calling it a night.

Value for price, it's about the best in Cap Hill, although I still lean toward the Wildrose for favorite Cap Hill bar overall, and Barca is a much nicer joint. But for a quick topper to the tank, it would be tough to beat the Jade Pagoda, and that's important, too.

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

From the outside you would never realize that Claudio’s is an upscale place with a menu and décor to warrant the name. From the outside Claudio’s is a simple looking building set up and back from the street a little bit. A simple wooden fence blocks view to a small drinking/dining area and the top of a white tent peeks out from the corner.

Walking up the steps and opening the door, the reality of Claudio’s immediately strikes you. Claudio’s is appointed in light polished wood and red velvet. There are also a number of nice touches that include attractive pictures, tall bottles filled with lemons or fruit and some curious little brass knickknacks.

The bar itself is really a waiting area to get seated. It is just long enough to seat 5 if you are all friendly. Fortunately Melody behind the bar is friendly if you engage her in a little conversation. The barstools are tall brass and red affairs. The bar itself is a polished red (lots of polish in this place.) Melody pours a strong drink of decent stuff. Considering where we were the $4 price tag plus tax was kind of nice.

Out back there is a little outdoor dining and eating area. In fact there was a group that was way in the back the whole time we were there and they seemed content never to leave. Melody would talk with Mickey occasionally (the chef) about them. We also told Mickey about our quest and she seemed entertained by. As we were about to leave, Mickey gave us a quick tour of the place and told us about this little 5 Course 6 Wine affair they were having for the (strangely) reasonable price of $80 a head. I wish I could afford that.

Despite its small bar, Claudio’s has a good liquor assortment as long as you don’t want Monarch or similar crap. They do have an espresso machine so if you need fresh coffee to sober you up, you are all set. Oh, there is also no smoking in the restaurant, but I’m sure they won’t object if you are outside (I heard Melody mention that she was going to go out for a smoke.)

This is a great date place and not a bad place for a drink if it is nice outside or there is no one else at the bar. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Drink Note: We recently learned that Vodka's like Skyy (and a bunch of other mid shelf booze) are the same price as the well gins and vodkas. Nice little note for those people who enjoy a high class drink.

Tonight we can hit one bar. That is it. We have bar 99 lined up for tomorrow and bar 100 on Thursday. We decided to make a quick trip down to Claudio's since it is so close to the house and it is before 11:00.

Sean was not originally going to go, but upon hearing that we could only go to a single bar, he decided why not. Claudio's is a damn nice place. In fact a little too nice. The $80 5 course meal with 6 wines sounded great but a tad out of our price range.

Anyhow, we sat at the minibar and chatted up Melody our lovely blonde bartender. She is quite attractive and friendly once you make a little effort. For some reason I can never seem to remember what we chat about with the bartenders. She mentioned that she had been working at Claudio's for 3 weeks and previous to that, she worked for a country club. Interesting fact: people who go to country clubs are usually lousy tippers. Good to know.

As the evening was wrapping up, Melody pulled these 4 glasses from behind the bar, each a different color. Each one had one of Claudio's specialty drinks. She had them so that she could try them and find out if they tasted all right. She passed the drinks around to us. The blue one was the best and no, I don't know what it was.

Melody said she would try to get to the Ballroom on Thursday, but I only give her about a 20% likelyhood of showing (of course at the time I am writing this journal entry, I already know that she doesn't show.) I think we actually gave her about a 35% chance as we walked back to the car.

Mickey, the chef also gave us a tour of the place and told us about their specials and whatnot. It is a hell of a date place, I am telling you.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Trendy

Tost is new. Damn new. As of our visit, it had only been open for about 2 months. In this short time though I have heard only good things about it and with good reason. Tost is located right across from Lenin and has a cool blue sign up above and sandwich board advertising Tost as a “Non-smoking Wine and Martini Bar.” I think that this is probably a pretty good combination as I know a lot of wealthy people who don’t smoke and who need a place to go out where they won’t be bothered by it.

Tost is a large single room with an interesting L shaped bar on one side, a sizeable stage across from it, a fireplace with a couch and numerous small tables. This place also has atmosphere coming out its ears (this comment was made by Wolf.) Oh and speaking of sponsors, thanks to Annie for both suggesting this place and Sponsoring us here.

Lining the walls is an amazing art exhibition by a local artist. I got the card of the woman who organizes the wall art. I am hoping that I can get my Paris exhibition stuff in here. There might actually be people who are able to afford the measly $250 or so I would price them for. Anyhow, their art choice was amazing, the lights they picked are cool and the whole place just has a great feel. Now I know this is weird, but they have great bathrooms. They are painted red, have red velvet curtains, and potpourri. Very classy.

Now while the well drinks were strong and decent they were a bit overpriced at $5.50. I counter this however by saying that their call and specialty drinks are $6 and are waaaay better. So if you go, just get the good stuff and know that you are getting a better drink for your money.

We spent almost the entire time talking with Tanea, the owner of Tost. She and her husband opened this place partially because they never got out to see live music. So now they bring the live music to them. They have a number of local artists of a folk/guitar/more mellow group. Tanae also said they are starting up a rock/pop night, which might be more my speed. My friend Glen loves chicks with guitars but they rarely live up to their potential for me. Oh, one more thing. The place has a warehouse ceiling (exposed metal girders) which provides an interesting offset to the otherwise chic décor but also provides great acoustics (or so I’m told.)

Tost also has a happy from 5 to 7 when they serve FREE WOODFIRED PIZZA and have drink specials. I suspect that I am going to be stopping in here on my home from work for some pizza. I think it is Tuesday through Friday or somesuch, I’m not really sure.

Everything about Tost is great, if you can afford the drink prices. Tanae is great and if you get a chance chat with her about whatever. She likes meeting new people if you do chat, mention that the 570 bars guys sent you. She’ll know who we were because she loved the idea.

I give Tost 4 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Tonight we once again get to hit a single bar. This one has been pre picked by our lovely sponsor Annie. We are meeting her at Tost for a drink. I never heard of Tost but Annie says that it is amazing. Anyway, after our Wednesday’s night gathering we gathered a bunch of people and mosied on over.

There was some initial wackiness with Annie, where she needed to go to a friend’s house right as we were about to pick her up, but then she said that she would meet us at Tost. We almost couldn’t wait for her anymore, but she showed at the last minute to fulfill her sponsorship role.

Our group was pretty good. It consisted of Jason, me, Annie, Vince, Sean and Wolf. We chatted with the owner a whole bunch and she really liked our idea. She is originally from Chicago and opened up this place so that she and her husband could have local bands come to them. Every year they would make a resolution to go out and see more live music, but every year they would utterly fail to do so. This way they have a great bar, that is non-smoking, with live music, Chicago style pizza, and an overabundance of class.

We all hung out there for a while, simply ogling the pictures that hung on the wall. They were just amazing with full rich color, striking subjects, and stylin’ prints. We chatted about who knows what and finally after about an hour decided it was time to head home. It was a great hour and the owner is tres’ cool.

-wOOt

I can't quite figure out Marcus'. This subterranean bar is a pit of blackness that often plays music I think my goth friends would be quite fond of, but it's not a goth bar. It's trendy and happening, but it's not a hipster place. It's got pricey, fancy drinks, but it still attracts a college crowd that looks as often as not like they would just buy a pitcher, but not at this place.

Cause Marcus' Martini Heaven is a great little joint, with a list of drinks that can be served in a martini glass longer than most people could get through in a month of visits. The drinks take a while to make, and the lines can get pretty long, with waits of 5 to 10 minutes for a drink not at all unusual, but they make a strong glass of ripple, so the wait is usually worth it. Especially great are flaming drinks, since one of the bartenders is actually willing to breath fire over certain beverage choices, creating a lovely pyrotechnic display.

There's never enough seating, so get to Marcus' early if you want to sit anyplace. The art is from local artists, and rotates out with some regularity; by and large it's weird, not very good stuff, but sometimes, there's a treasure on the walls. The lights are pretty much non-existant, only candles in martini glasses and a few dim flourescents. The drinks aren't cheap, but they are strong, so there's value for your dollar in Marcus'. Also, since it's located so close to so many other bars, it's a great place to start off a night, getting a table early and staying for a drink or two, then moving on as the place starts to really fill up.

I'll go to Marcus' again, just like I've gone before. It only ended up this late in the listings because we knew, rightly, there would be an event in the bar, in this case, Minister Nihil's B-day celebrations. And once more, thanks to Wolf for picking up the tab sponsoring his sixth bar out of the first hundred.

At street level across the alley from Marcus' is Trattoria Mitchelli, a nice Italian restaurant from the same people who own Stella's in the U-District and Angelina's down in West Seattle. We went there while Nihil's group persued his party to bars we had already visited. We sat at what seemed like it might have been a bar, except for the utter lack of booze bottles, but upon reflection turned out to be the lunch counter. It was fine though, although the real bar was in an entirely different part of the rather large business.

Our waitress, Faith, mentioned the Stranger article that inspired us before we had even mentioned what we were doing, which was kind of odd, but made the explanation a little quicker. We ordered drinks-mine was reasonably strong- and had some tasty bruschetta. Oddly, although we hadn't really realized it was a lunch counter, we acted pretty much as if it was, eating and reading the paper. Faith was busy with other customers, so we didn't chat much, but after we finished our drinks, she did suggest we should maybe head down to Elliott's on the wharf a couple blocks away, and so we did so, not having any oth