The Types

Neighborhood - A traditional bar that has little in the way of a theme and has mostly local customers
Sports - A bar with a primary sports theme
Nightclub - An establishment whose primary purpose is dancing and mingling
Irish Pub - A bar with a primary Irish theme
Nightspot - A bar without a theme that attracts non-locals
Hotel - A bar within a hotel
Restaurant - A bar contained within an establishment that is primarily a restaurant
Lounge - A quiet place to sit and have a drink
Denny's - Any chain restaurant where each place looks the same

The Classes

Average - Décor: Nothing special, Patrons: Varies, Drinks: Varies
Classic - Décor: Nostalgic, Patrons: Older, Drinks: Varies
Dive - Décor: Low Quality, Patrons: Blue-collar, Drinks: $3
Midscale - Décor: Nice Quality, Patrons: White-collar/College, Drinks: $4 - $5
Trendy - Décor: Stylish, Patrons: Young and “Beautiful”, Drinks: $5+
Upscale - Décor: High Quality, Patrons: Well-off, Drinks: $5+
Working - Décor: Low Quality, Patrons: Blue-collar, Drinks: $3 - $4

These are not hard and fast, but give a general impression as to what type of establishment a bar is. I will update these as I decide there need to be more categories.

-wOOt

Welcome to 570 Bars.com

Within these pages you will find the chronicles of two average guys who live in Seattle and plan to drink in every Spirits Serving Establishment within the city. This website is filled with the stories of each of those nights, reviews of the bars, comments from other people like you and finally anything else that think you might enjoy.

The Idea: To drink in every bar in Seattle.

The article that sparked the Idea: Read the 6th paragraph specifically.

The Reason: For the past several months I have been feeling very dissatisfied with my social situation. We used to have a huge social circle made up of interesting and diverse people who each had friends that I did not know. Now that circle has shrunk considerably. We used to throw parties, but now we go out to the same six places. In these past years many of my friends are, well, growing up. Growing up and getting on with your life is all well and good if you have someone to do it with. Since I don't have anyone like that, I guess I might as well create a bizarre artificial goal to give me purpose and to get me out of the house and meeting new and interesting people.

A Response To Concerns

When we announced this quest, Jason and I received several responses, both encouraging and concerned. Several of our friends expressed concerns that we were becoming (?) drunks and perhaps should go to AA.

In response to these concerns, I want to first say, "Thank you for caring enough about me to voice your concerns, but they are unfounded." The reason for this is simple enough. We will be having a single drink in each establishment. This is enough time to get a feel for the place, to enjoy a tasty beverage, and to chat with the clientele or bartender that happens to standing nearest to us. The drinks themselves are secondary to the exploration of the Seattle bars. Yes there will be nights when we hit 7 bars and are nicely buzzed by the end, but this will be the exception, not the rule.

-w00t

The Rules

1) Only Spirits Serving Establishments must be visited
2) If the establishment is only a restaurant, it may be skipped
3) At least one of us (Jason or I) must drink spirits in a place, but the other is free to drink beer or wine if they choose
4) If a restaurant’s bar has its own name (like the Mandarin Room) then it must be visited
5) Only one drink must be consumed by each person for the place to be considered “done.”

Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

Inside of the Moon Temple Restaurant is a seedy lounge area named the Mandarin Room. Immediately upon walking in you can tell that this is not exactly what you would call a high-class joint. In fact, you might be tempted to call it a dive. The lighting is dim, the decor is questionable, but all in all, it has a nice divey feel without actually having a divey clientele.

The lounge itself probably seats about thirty to forty people, depending on how friendly everyone is. There really isn't a lot of standing room, but this isn't a standing room kind of place. There is also a "banquet" area in the back, but while it is big, it isn't "nice."

The drinks were exceptionally strong (I could not really taste the orange juice in my screwdriver.) The real bonus here though, is that there is full kitchen service to the bar. The Sweet and Sour pork (I think) that we ordered had a generous portion, good flavor, and inexpensive price tag. The waitress was nice, but there was only the one of her for I think the whole seating area, thus leaving her a little over worked.

All in all though, it is a good place to sit with friends, have a few drinks and order to some food before going out. I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

It all started in the Mandarin Room, which is the bar inside of the Moon Palace. Its only notable feature is that you can get strong drinks and a full Chinese food menu. There was also a cute waitress, but really, that’s not remarkable at all. We were talking about an article in the Stranger that said there were 570 establishments that serve spirits (booze to you and me.) Now, before I go any further I should mention that we were sober. Dead Sober. One drink does not crazy ideas make. I should also give a little background in so far as to say, that Jason and I have been without purpose and direction for the last month or so. We have been unhappy with our social situation, and have felt that our friends have, for the most part, become unfun. Sure there is the occasional party, or spontaneous gathering, but it is usually one of us who is responsible for making it happen. Jesse throws the occasional LAN party, but that just does not cut it, especially for Jason who doesn’t play FPSs (First person Shooters).

With all of this in mind, Jason and I (and Sean who was along for the ride and agreed it was a good idea) decided that we had to visit every one of those 570 “bars” in Seattle. It may take us the next year or two, but we will accomplish this goal. We had already planned on hitting three bars that night, just because we had never been to any of them. And so, our idea was born. From there, the brainstorming began. We knew about the Star Wars guys who are now “world” famous for sitting outside the Cinerama for 6 months for Star Wars tickets. If they could become minor celebrities, why couldn’t we? As the night progressed, the ideas started to unfold. Sean would build us a website to track our trek. I would call the State Liquor board to get a complete list of places to go. Jason would get us Sponsors. After about the 5th bar we began to realize that it was going to get expensive (somewhere in the neighborhood of 5K) and that we would need people to sponsor us (or should I say, buy us booze.) They would get all of the credit, none of the blame and (thanks to Gwen) maybe provide bail money should it become necessary.

On night one, we started at the Moon Palace for a way too strong Screwdriver, at the Jitterbug I had a Sidecar (very tasty), at Murphy’s I had the most crap ass G&T ever (in a really small glass to boot.) At Goldie's we played darts (I won 2 out of 3 – “Brandon. You throw like a Jew. But I guess that’s a good thing.”) At Changes they had on the Golden Girls but we were able to get $1.50 Harp and Vodka Cran (Finlandia) for $3.50. Then we were going to go home, but it was only 11:30 so why not hit two more. Then it was on to the Tin Hat on 65th, where we told our first outsider about our plan (Hey Mia – you will get a pin or something.) We played Yatzee, and all three of us got a Yatzee. I got 2, thus securing a victory in, literally, the last moments of the game. Finally we went to Molly McQuires for a quick G&T and some not terrible karaoke. Finally I dropped off the motley crew and went home.

It was not until that night, trying to sleep, the darkness closing in on me, that the enormity of the task that lay ahead of us finally began to settle on me. At this same time, Jason, tried to sleep in his own place, but found that the spinning walls would not let him sleep. It was from this, and from the fact that we simply cannot consume that much liquid, that our Spirits Rule was developed. I must admit that the enormity of the task still weighs on me, but I am starting to get into the rhythm and I hope to become something of a local celebrity over it. Maybe we can get an interview on the Daily Show. That would be awesome.

-w00t

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

When we walked in I was immediately struck by how nice this place looked. While the entire place maybe seats about 30 to 40 everything looked to be of exceptional quality. The walls were painted red, but there was a lot of texture and the artwork was excellent. Walking in, you could immediately see the cooking area. I always consider this an excellent sign.

We were immediately shown up to the "bar", which was really just a little area room to the right that had a bar, a couple of tables and a couple of booths. It was very cozy, and I could easily see taking a date here for a nice quiet dinner.

I ordered a Side Car and while the drinks were a little pricey, they were excellent. Now I should mention that when I say pricey, I mean the drinks cost about $6, but at least you can taste the quality. This is not a problem as long as you can afford the quality.

The wait staff was all cute and attentive. Our waitress was very friendly and was happy to explain the various drinks on the specialty menu. It always nice to have staff that seems to really care about (even if they are only paid to be nice.) Oh one last note that struck me as nice. After we had finished our drinks they came up to check if we wanted another. Now despite the fact that they were obviously about to close, they sincerely seemed to be happy to let us have another drink and allow us to just lounge around, while they worked. We declined, but it was nice anyhow.

All in all, while this is really a place for dinner, I am happy to give it 3 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5. It is definitely above average, even if your just going for drinks.

-w00t

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Mid-Scale

Now before I totally pan this bar let me start by saying, that yes ... we only had one drink there. The atmosphere seemed ok (if you like the backward hat, Abercrombie & Fitch wearing white guy.) But what it comes down to is this. THE DRINK I HAD WAS ASS*!!!.

I ordered a G&T. The glass I got was like a normal glass' younger brother who had not yet hit puberty. The drink itself was as weak as a ten-year-old girl. Generally I like a little tonic with my gin, but in this case, I got the feeling that the drink was actually catholic and its father owned a gun. The gin was introduced to the tonic but it wasn't actually allowed to touch it.

Now if you are ordering beer and like Abercrombie & Fitch, this is the place for you. If you like your Gin and Tonic to be doing the nasty then go to Changes across the street.

I give this place 1 Martini Glass crushed beneath your boot out of 5.

*ASS:
1) To be truly and completely horrible
2) To smell like a person's posterior

-wOOt

Type: Sports Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

Goldie’s is a sports bar, pure and simple. It has no pretensions about what it is (except for the dusty espresso machine off to one side.) It has four or five pool tables, four dart machines, sports video games, numerous TVs, and you can answer trivia to cut your bar bill in half. We had a great time here. When we went on Thursday, it was not crowded and while I don't really go for "sporty" women, or "sporty" men groupies (also a type of woman), the women here were plentiful and cute.

We played darts, drank our drinks, watched the updates on March Madness, and just generally had a good time. I don't really have that much else to say, other than that I really liked the place. I give it 3 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Dive

I have very little to say about this bar except for the following things:

1) It is a gay bar
2) They have a pool table
3) The drinks are cheap and good ($3.50 for Finlandia Cran and Cranberry Juice)
4) They had Golden Girls playing on several of their TVs.

Now I don’t really know how to feel about this whole Golden Girls issue. When I was younger I always used to watch this show as it was part of the regular line-up. But looking back at the show now, it just kind of gives me the willies. Did you know that there are actual Golden Girls Groupies, out there? Kind of frightening if you ask me.

All that being said, as I am not gay, I will simply give a nice standard 3 Martini Glasses out of 5. If you are gay, you might want to add another glass to that.

-wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Average

The Tin Hat is the place to go if you are looking to have a few drinks with friends in a pub atmosphere. They have good seating (although the table we were using wobbled a little), a cute waitress, and stacks of games. We played Yatzee while drinking. This is a long-standing tradition amongst a different group of friends, and I have to say I forgot how much fun it is. Pat and Tony don't even need the Yatzee sheets anymore (able to recreate them from memory.)

Now the Tin Hat, I will admit, will forever hold a special place in my heart. It was hear that we met Maia. Maia is a waitress there and she was both interested and interesting. She was the first person we told about our quest and she was fully supportive of the idea. I suspect that Maia could easily have broken our quest right there if she denounced our idea and mocked us. But instead we now place Maia on a pedestal. She will get some sort of special reward I think. I just don't know what yet.

The drinks were average, but I mean this in a good way. They tasted right, were a good price, and were served promptly. Any drink less than average (see the reviews for Murphy's) will be duly noted. I consider average to be the baseline, so don't let its apparent lack luster description sway you.

All in all The Tin Hat is a great example of a neighborhood bar. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Dive

This is your standard neighborhood Irish pub (sort of.) There is nothing special about this place unless you like substandard Karaoke, and bartenders who scoff at your ideas.

The drinks were average, they have a single pool table and a dartboard (real darts however). Generally I might consider rating them a little higher, but with The Tin Hat, right next door, there is absolutely no good reason to go here.

I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Sports Bar
Class: Average

This is your typical University Sports bar, but that’s not a bad thing. When we were there it was empty, which I will say was a little strange for about 9 pm on a Friday, but I imagine the crowds come later.

It is dim, cool (temperature wise), had several TVs and a couple of very cute waitresses. There are two dartboards and a pool table. There is a "dance" floor (I think that’s what it was) in the center of the place. They were offering $3 Long Island Ice Teas. They were crappy bar Long Islands, but who I am too pass up strong drinks cheap. I was tempted to stay for another, but it is only day two of our quest, so I am going to have to stick to the rules. Only one drink per place while there is still drinking to do.

Jason ran into a friend of his, Dan, who is, according to Jason, "the best looking guy I know." Now I am not really a good judge of how attractive a man is (as that is not how I swing) but I will say, that he was good looking. In addition, I guess he is very creative and liked our idea. He said that he was going to make us some business cards. I hope that this is the case, especially if he is as talented as Jason describes.

I am not a big fan of sports bars, but I suspect this one is pretty good. So I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

We are going to see Allen’s (co-worker of Jason) band play tonight at Rain Dancer on the Ave. Having just done 7 bars the night before, I am still up for a bunch more, but Jason can't take another full tour. Instead we just hit the All-American (with $3 Long Islands, two cute bartenders and Jason’s friend Dan who we are going to try to get to design business cards for us.) We were going to hit the Big Time Brewery, but when we discovered all they had was wine and beer, we ditched cause it didn’t count. We also hit Flowers for a G&T. Jason had been there many times before, but I had never actually had a drink there, so we hit it quick and then moved on.

Rain Dancer was nice, but the $5 cover for the bands was annoying. Good drinks, but the cash only bar made it really difficult as we were running low. We met up with Allen and other bookstore people. We also met two girls, Janet and Jessica. Jessica forgot her ID, so I offered to drive them home, so they wouldn’t miss the show. Hey anything to break the ice with two early twenties hotties. Jessica is too tall, (tall girls don’t date me), but Janet is very cute. It was just a quick jaunt back and I heard their stories. Interesting, but I won’t get into them here. Jessica it turns out is from Milwaukee and we bonded over the Safe House. I even broke the rules and told her the password. I hope that they don’t revoke my V.I.O (Very Important Operative) license from me. Allen’s band was good, but it had no vocals so it was a little odd. Oh, a final note. Janet accidentally smoked my lucky (smokers know what I am talking about.) I hope it turns out to be good for her, but you should never smoke another person’s lucky (get your minds out of the gutter.)

-w00t

Class: Neighborhood Bar
Type: Average

There is no other way to describe Flowers other than as cozy. All of the tables are very close together and the lighting is dim and friendly. The tables are smaller than average and the whole effect is to give one a sense of friendliness or claustrophobia, depending on which way you swing. The decor is nice, I guess, but it is really just a hodge podge of stuff that simply adds to its cozy feel.

The clientele though, is the reason to go to Flowers. It is always filled with higher quality co-eds than you would get at a place like the All American. The problem lies in the coziness though. There is not really room for you to stand and flirt with your neighbor. It is great if you are going with a small group, but trying to meet people here requires you to "accidentally" eavesdrop on a conversation, which is almost a requirement.

The G&T was strong and good. I liked the atmosphere, but it would have been better with a group rather than just Jason and I. I give this bar 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

We went to Rain Dancer to see a friend of Jason's band perform. Now I accept $5 cover to get in, but I should at least mention that I really hate cover charges. We did not have a cover charge at Zach’s, and a lot of places skip the cover, cause your drinking. But really, I accept it and move on. The part I am going to gripe about though, is the fact that it was a cash only bar. I am not sure if they are always a cash only bar, if their credit card machine was on the blink, or what, but I HATE cash only. I would prefer to live in a cashless society. If I could swipe my debit card through a soda machine I would and I would be blissfully happy for those 10 seconds I didn't spend digging through my pockets for change and then feeding the machine. This cash only bar problem is compounded by the fact that I just spent most of my cash at the All American and at Flowers. But who could have predicted.

Rain Dancer's layout is split into 3 main areas: Front seating, bar w/ island standing room, and a performance/food area.

The Front seating area has high chairs and small round tables perfect for two. Alternatively you can do what we did and shanghai the entire area and just stand and sit as you like.

The bar area is long and wavy and looks nice. Next to it is the prime flirting area with a stand up island and very little room. Thus you can place your drinks down but you have to keep squeezing up to the person next to you so people can scoot on by.

The back area is a large seating area, with a small clear area to dance (not that anyone did.) The stage is well sized and it is an excellent place to see a nice intimate show.

I do have one other major complaint about the place, and that would be the men's bathroom. The men's bathroom is a single room with a toilet, a urinal, a sink, and NO LOCK!!. You will be in there pissing and then some other guy walks in and uses the other facility. Then a 3rd guy comes in and just stands in a corner cause there is no more room, and then finally a 4th guy opens the door, sees the situation and decides that he can hold it. Now if you don't have to piss then this is real damn problem. Lets just say that I do not approve of this situation at all.

So to sum up: Good space to see a band. Cash bar sucks. Nice place for socializing. Bathroom sucks. Drinks are pretty good. So I guess it evens out to a 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

The Sit and Spin is probably one of the most unique establishments in all of Seattle. It is one part 24 hour Laundromat, one part bar, one part restaurant, and one part concert space. It does all of these thing moderately well. The drinks were average, the piece of pizza I had was decent, the washing machines seemed fine, and the concert space was cozy.

The Sit and Spin does not have a lot of room devoted to one thing, but I think the mix was interesting enough that I would come back here, especially if I needed to do laundry at 11:30 PM. They had several old video games (Galaga and Centipede - oh how I hate you spider) and the wait staff was both friendly and mean spirited. Jason pointed out that they had OEB (Old English Bitter?) on draft. I guess that’s a good thing, but I'll stick to my snooty micro-brews and G&Ts, thank you.

The concert space seriously lacked for seating (it had about 10-15 people worth of seating around the edges) but once the show started all of the standing people would block your view. We saw several bands there, and sound system varied from being decent, to being very loud when the drummer struck the Timpani (made me wince every time.)

All in all, I really liked it and would definitely go back. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar
Class: Upscale

The Brasserie Margaux is located in the Westin Hotel (Ed note: Actually, as bardude points out, it is the Warwick - sorry Warwick) across from the Cinerama. Just walking into this hotel bar you can tell that it is a nice comfortable place where you can have an excellent drink and just sit and talk with some friends or that "special someone."

Sitting down, the first indication that this is a really nice place is that there are no prices on your drink menu. But since we about to have our first official sponsor, thanks to Wolf, we figured it should be a nice place, and he wasn't complaining.

Jason ordered a Lemon drop and I ordered a Cremesicle. Man those were some excellent drinks. It was all top shelf booze and you could taste it. Mine of $7.50 and Jason's was $6.50, but it was worth it.

I really loved it here and could easily spend more time here. It was not crowded on a Saturday night, if that is what you like, and I imagine the food is also excellent. We had some bar snacks and those were tasty. I give 4 and Half Martini Glasses our of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

We walked into the Dahlia Lounge at about 11:15 on a Saturday night. Walking through the front entrance we were greeted by a well-dressed gentleman who gave us a nod. I think he could tell we were not there for food. I would like to start by saying that decor was excellent. It was set in soft reds, with nice colored paper lanterns, and dark wood. It had a very downtown cosmopolitan feel.

The bar was well stocked and even though the place was mostly empty, there was, relatively, a bunch of wait staff. I got the feeling that dinner had just ended and that they were still open mainly to clean up and serve some last booze to those straggling denizens of downtown.

We ordered our drinks and sat in a tiny booth. Now, unfortunately, the drinks had the prices of a downtown bar, with the quality. My G&T tasted, well, ... off. I don't know if it was cheap gin, if it was poorly mixed, or if it was just an average G&T and I had just had a truly excellent Creamsicle Martini over at the Brasserie Margaux. But it was definitely nothing to write home about.

While I suspect that the food is very good, and that this would a great place to bring a date you would like to impress, bringing her to the small bar area for a quick drink is not the way to do it.

I found the place to be a typical downtown establishment: Pretty, expensive, but only of average quality drinks. As such I give it 2 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Night three of quest continues. Tonight Jason has a friend (a couple actually) who used to work at the bookstore and now his band is playing at the Sit and Spin. Now the Sit and Spin is one part bar, one part “restaurant” and one part Laundromat. They also have a performance space in the back. We decide to go and see a band there and knock off bar #11. The Sit and Spin is cool. I almost wish I needed to leave my house to do laundry. They have old video games (Galaga and Centipede) and a good atmosphere. We get there a little too early, but since Wolf drove, that is ok. Jason and I buy drinks while Wolf is parking. When they open up the backspace we head and grab some chairs. I meet a death merchant who gives me coupons for 3 free packs of camels. I don’t usually smoke them, but they’re free so, what the heck. I meet a friend of Jason’s and make some really terrible small talk. I’ve got to fix that. There really is nothing worse than small talk. I mean really, small talk is bad enough. The first band is pretty good, but the Timpani is really loud and makes me wince whenever they hit it. After they are done, we realize that we know nothing about band 2 and decide we need to hit other bars while we are down here.

The next place we hit is easily the nicest place we have been. The Brasserie Margaux in the Warwick hotel was very nice. The drinks were excellent if pricey. I deviated from my stand G&T and had a Cremecicle Martini. It was excellent. I couldn’t even taste the Galliano (yuck!), at least not until Jason pointed it out. It was here that we picked up our first official sponsor. Thank you Wolf (yes, his real name.) Despite having given up booze for lent (what is up with that), he decided to do it anyhow. This place has the added bonus of being across from the Cinerama, so booze and movies.

After wandering down past a closed restaurant and a hotel with no bar, we ended up at the Dahlia Lounge. Now those were some pricey drinks. The place was nice, and I suspect the food is excellent but dang. At least the glasses that they gave us were big. I’m kind of glad that Wolf drove. Its nice having a built in Designated Driver. Oh, I should mention, that it occurred to me, that the Dahlia Lounge would bar #13 and that we might not want to end it there. I was informed drunks are usually superstitious. Well, since I’m not a drunk, I decided that I was being silly and stopped being superstitious. I hope (on both accounts.)

We went back to the S&S, saw the last band and then headed home. I have to say that every band needs a stand up base.

-w00t

Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

The Rickshaw is full of true seedy goodness. This place is one part diner one part Chinese food restaurant, and one part bar. They host Karaoke nights, serve questionable but edible diner food (which is good, but in a diner kind of way), and have the longest happy hour known to man (from 7am to 4pm, everyday, I think.)

You could tell that our waitress was a goddess of the dive and would be equally at home slinging plates, pouring booze, or putting a big drunk guy in his place. Despite the fact that I outweighed her by probably 100 lbs, there is no way, I would ever be willing to stand up to her. She just had that "look" about her.

Our drinks were strong and cheap (just like the booze they use). The kitchen stays open until a midnight, but supposedly you can usually get food after that, since the cooks are also the night cleaners (I'm not sure how I feel about that.)

All in all, a great Sunday morning hangover cure. I give it 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

It is time for food. It is time to go to the Rickshaw, up on Greenwood. They breakfast, Chinese food, and drinks. The drink is strong, and cheap. The food is pretty good too. The waitress informed us that they normally have happy hour from 7AM to 4PM. Now that’s a happy hour. We even sat in the Rickshaw for almost an hour before I looked to the left and saw the full bar. I guess Jason had seen it ages before and had been just waiting for me to realize it and for me to say something. Once I noticed it had to be done. We discovered a bizarre thing here. Jason’s screwdriver was $3. My G&T was $3.25. They had charged me .25 for tonic. Why? Isn’t OJ more costly than tonic?

I would later learn from a friend of mine who delivers mixers for a living that Tonic is actually one of the most expensive mixers they have (short of Red Bull.) Of course, it is still the difference of pennies on the dollar, but it is about 1/3rd more expensive than the average mixer.

-w00t

After picking up Jason from work, he mentioned that we could get in a quick bar before our game tonight. Deciding he was right, we stopped in at the Canterbury Ale and Eats at the North end of 15th in Cap Hill right down from my house. It is was seedy, smoky, and had a chair that just wanted to drift me towards the game machine it was sitting in front of. Not a bad place but not terribly memorable, except for the suit of armor and the fact that we got $3 doubles.

After our game, the Society for the Prevention of the Needless Slaughter of Naugas sponsored us at two more places: The Satellite Lounge and the Elysium Brewery. I have been told that the Elysium beer will make you ill, so avoid it all costs. Their booze is good, and their food is ok as long as you like their kind of Cap Hill Eclectic menu. I have nothing bad to say about the Satellite Lounge though as the food is good, the waitresses and bartenders are all hotties (even if one of them had to be pointed out the Rum.) They occasionally have live music and the place has a good atmosphere.

We did look at the Wild Rose, but decided that now was the wrong time to try to hit it.

-w00t

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Dive

The Canterbury Ale and Eats is located on the north most edge of 15th in Capitol Hill. Even from the outside, you can tell that it has a distinctive feel (whether you like that feel or not.) I have always had a soft spot for faux Olde' English style places in the US. They are pure kitsch (tacky but in a good way.) The outside is modeled like a medieval pub, with olde' style woodworking and a sign that hangs in front proclaiming where you are.

When you enter initially, there is a small dining area with well-worn old dark wood. It would look really nice except for the fact that it is all obviously just worn down. To the left is a small dining area where people seem to be enjoying dinner. The bar area is dark and smoky. We get drinks that are effectively $3 doubles. They are not good drinks, but they are sizeable drinks. Off in a side room, only accessible through the bar are several pool tables. The people standing around them, are dive people. They fit right in.

You know you are in Capitol Hill when you look up at the Pull-tab machine and there is a big bowl of free condoms sitting on top of it. I will also mention that this happens to be the closest bar to Volunteer Park. Now, I'm saying anything about that except, well I am. On a completely unrelated note, I was sitting in the chair that rests in front of the game machine, and it kept spinning me back towards the games. It was like the chair was programmed to draw its sitter to the game so that they would have to drop a quarter in, if only to appease the hungry beast.

On a side note, I have eaten there before and while the food is not terrible, it is not good either. It is a good dive, and probably the only one you can find on the hill (other than the Comet.) While their drinks are strong, the atmosphere was too oppressive for me to really get into drinking there. The Canterbury is a good stop, but not a destination. I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

--wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Mid-Scale

The Satellite has a Martini Bar feel, without actually really having the martinis. The lighting is soft, the seating is spacious (if you can actually get some), the food is good, the art is, well, Capitol Hill wall art. There is room for live music in the back, but to be perfectly honest the place is too small to allow the band to play and to allow you still carry on your conversation and anything less than a dull roar.

Normally the service her is pretty good, but tonight, the waitress was slow to come over and our Sponsor came back with the following story, "So I order the drinks and the bartender is looking confused. She casts around and stares are the bottles before her. She just can't seem to find what she is looking for. Finally, she turns to her co-worker and asks, 'Which one is the rum?' " Now here is my point. She may be new, but if she has ever made a drink in her entire life, then she should be able to read the labels and figure out which is the rum bottle. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to mix a rum and coke, but I suspect it might help.

The drink was passable, nothing special. I have had their seafood pasta primavera that was just great. But instead of staying to eat we just drank our drinks and moved on. I wish I could comment on the prices but our Sponsor paid, so I don't know.

When it comes to women, the Satellite does attract a high quality gal. Unfortunately, it also attracts her high quality boyfriend. This is really a date place, rather than a drinks place. I give it 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

--wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

The Elysian Brewery is very spacious, has some comfortable booths, but is mainly only ok table seating. There is typical Brewery decor and to be perfectly honest, how many times can you be impressed with a place decorated with giant beer vats that they don't let you drink out of.

The menu here is highly questionable, in that it has that bizarre health nut/trendy Capitol Hill styles where everything sounds like something that you would normally eat, but has all sorts of unusual ingredients that really you would rather avoid.

Now I realize that this is a brewery, but whatever you do, DO NOT DRINK THE BEER. I know a number of people who have gotten ill from drinking the beer here. I don't mean, too much beer so I'm puking in some stranger's yard, amounts. I mean, a beer or two and now I think I am sick. We were sticking with hard liquor anyhow and you don't have to worry whether the gin has turned.

The Elysian appears to be a great place, but when you look closer, it is just a large eatery with a questionably trendy menu and your standard fair of drinks. I will say that I have drunk the Dragon's Tooth Oatmeal Stout and while I didn't get sick, it was not really a good beer. If you are looking for average drinks (the hard stuff), a place to sit and chat with your friends, and an "experimental" menu, then this is the place for you. If you want the same thing, but better, go to the Satellite Lounge down the street. Then when you discover that there is no seating in the Satellite Lounge because it is kind of small, come back here and grab a table.

I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

This is my first entry, and the first entry on the site at all.

And this is me explaining it all.

I'm Jason. My last name will likely not be terribly hard to find out, but for the moment, I'm not using it. With my friend Brandon, it's my quest to drink at all the spirits-serving establishments (SSEs) in Seattle. And that is pretty much the basic idea.

But how did this come about? Well, the Stranger had an article about drinking and the law, and mentioned in it that there were more than 500 SSEs in Seattle. I got to wondering if anyone had ever drunk at them all. And I couldn't think anyone had. So I talked it over with Brandon, misremembering the number as 570. And so it came to be that we had an idea, and a quest. And a day later, or thereabouts, we had our first drinks. And the start of this site, courtesy of Sean.

Now on to the first week.

It's been a pretty busy week. Since we started, last Thursday, we've already hit 17 bars. Which is only a tiny portion of our goal, but isn't bad in a general way.

We started on the 21st, with the idea of just going for a drink. We'd already talked about the concept of hitting all the SSEs in the city, but it didn't seem likely to begin any time soon. But then, as we were heading toward the Moon Temple for a drink, I suggested we should maybe hit a few bars in the area, and start that night. Brandon was all for it, and so we began.

The Mandarin Room in the Moon Temple was quickly followed by the cozy Jitterbug Cafe and collegiate Murphy's. Those three, that was going to be it. But then we were in Wallingford, and there were so many bars just within the block. We decided we'd go to Goldie's, and maybe hit another bar after. O'Shea's, maybe, although it was a couple of blocks away. But in Goldie's, with their fine Trivia night and darts, we kind of decided to skip O'Shea's. It seemed we were done.

Which fails to explain how we ended up, three minutes later, downing cheap booze in Changes, the isolated gay bar of the north end, while the Golden Girls played on the TVs.

And there really is no explaination. It was there. So we went in, because we were there.

But on the drive home, we decided we could hit one or two more bars. So we went to the friendly Tin Hat, and had a drink while playing Yahtzee. And we walked a few yards to Molly McGuires, and finished off the night listening to Karaoke.

Seven bars. A bit less than four hours. I'm not sure what we were thinking.

We were started, though. And now we were committed. Or maybe just should be committed.

The next night, the 22nd, my friend Alan's band was playing at the Raindancer, in the lovely University District. We arrived to watch him play and realized we were rather early, so that we decided to have a drink at the All-American Sports Bar and Grill. A sadly empty place, which is strange, because they had $3 iced teas and were very nice. We ran into my friend Dan, about whom more will likely be shortly heard, since he's (hopefully) doing some work for us. And after that reasonably short stop, we headed off to Flowers, just a block away, to get in another drink. I should note that the whole goal of this is just to drink in every SSE, and as I'd already drank in Flowers, only Brandon had a drink.

We then moved on to Raindancer, and had a drink there. It's a nice place where they give new bands a chance, and it was a good time. We saw Alan play, and I met a few of his other friends (hello to Janet and Jessica). Sadly, the show went late enough that we couldn't hit another bar, since I had to work the next day. But ten in two days wasn't bad.

The 23rd of March. 10 bars in the last two days. And I haven't mentioned, but I was really rather sick all day on the 22nd. Those seven bars on the first night, and all that. But tonight there's another show, with people I used to work with playing at the Sit N Spin, and my friend Sam's band is playing, too.

It's Brandon and me, and this time my brother Wolf is coming along as well. He's not drinking at present, so he's just along for the show and the fun.

I've never been to the Sit N Spin. It's a great place, though, and I don't know exactly how I never ended up there. We had pizza and drinks right away, and I chatted with people I knew from work. Anyway, we watched the Dutch Flat play, and they were great, but then there was some middle band no one knew anything about, so we decided to go get drinks in the neighborhood.

The Brasserie Margaux in the Warwick Hotel is very nice. Their drinks are very nice. And my brother was very nice, in that he became our very first sponsor by buying us our drinks there. Which, considering their price, is a good thing for me, as I'm very much poor.

From there we made our way to the Dahlia Lounge, which has very freshly squeezed orange juice for their screwdrivers. It was nice, but again, kind of spendy.

On our way back, we ran into Lee Anne from my work, who said the middle band was a) terrible and b) hidden in the fog of their smoke machines. Reglecting on the wisdom of missing their show entirely, we returned to the Sit N Spin.

Until the Sweet Science started, I talked with my by this time rather drunken friends and acquaintances. It's funny. I'm on this quest to drink everyplace, and they're staying in one place getting far more drunk than I am. I don't know what to think about that. But I suppose, if I had the money, I'd be as drunk as all of them.

Sweet Science was great. The rest of the night was great. And the next day, we went to a very late breakfast at the Rickshaw Restaurant. Upon discovering they were just a bar after 1 am, we realized we had to have a drink there, and so took number 14 at about 2 pm on a Sunday.

Scandalous, what we'll do in the name of our quest.

We didn't drink on Monday, which seems to my now addled mind to be a waste of a good night. But I'm busy with other things on Monday, so it's not very convenient. There will probably be very little Monday drinking in this quest.

Tuesday's a different matter. On that night, Brandon and I and a bunch of friends are pretty much always together at Brandon's place anyway, and I knew we could hit a couple of bars.

The first one was right after work. Brandon picked me up (he has a car, while I am a sad little pedestrian) and we went to the Canterbury Arms, where they make a large and strong beverage, but where the bar is in some ways rather seedy. Free condoms, loud music, dim lighting and worn counters. Good value, though, and we were started for the night.

Hours later, after we were all done hanging out at Brandon's, we went out for drinks, and encountered our second sponsor, who will be called Mr. Anonymous . In any case, we were bought drinks at the Satellite, which is a funky little place with a cute bartendress, and then after an attempt at the closing-early 1200, ended up at the Elysian Brewery, where we raised a glass to our friend Tony's successful purchase of a house, and where we finished off bar number 17.

And Wednesday turned out to be another dead night, since we would have gotten off to a late start, and Brandon has stuff to do to get ready for his Passover seder tomorrow. Which might rather slow us down for another night.

So perhaps nothing more til Friday.

I really liked this place. The drinks, well, I can't even say. I don't even rightly recall what I had. I'd presume a Screwdriver. But that doesn't matter. On the first night, when we hit seven bars, this one still seems special. And for several reasons.

First, the staff were nice. When we told a waitress our idea, she didn't think we were crazy, she thought it sounded fun. I like this.

Second, the place is pretty friendly in general. There's a good amount of room, but it's split up into smaller areas by partial walls and suchlike. It's both open and cozy. And it was neither too bright, nor pitch black, the usual bar extremes which can often annoy.

Third, they had Yahtzee. Okay, maybe we just got a good table, but still, they had Yahtzee. And okay, I got my ass handed to me, and Sean sadly had his perfectly good win stolen from him by Brandon's last minute second Yahtzee, but that's rather unimportant in the scale of things. They had Yahtzee, you see.

Did I mention this was #6 of the night?

Still, it was a great place.

Located in the Moon Temple, what can you say about the bar in a Chinese restaurant where you can get the full menu?

You can say, Hell Yeah!

The staff is attentive, the food is pretty good, the portions are generous and the drinks, while not great, didn't suck either. And they were pretty strong. Everyone was nice, and the waitress we had was cute, if you like the ladies.

Good starting point for your night, in other words. With food and pretty strong drinks, and everything at reasonable prices, you can't go wrong.

Okay, by our actual rules, I don't think this place qualifies. But the rules were really shaky that first night. So although the bar isn't really open after the restaurant closes, and although it doesn't really have a seperate identity like the Mandarin Room, I'm still counting it.

It's a nice place. Very nice. Looks good, although it's very small, and the drinks were tasty, if a bit more than I like to pay. But you get what you pay for, and at the Jitterbug, it shows. They close kind of early, but even as they were closing, they asked with seeming sincerity if we wanted another drink. Not in the "Anything else?" way that implies, could you go please, but rather as if they really wanted to be sure we had consumed our fill.

Good place.

It is Thursday evening at about 5:00 and I need to leave work early so that I can get home and cook a brisket for Passover. You see, I am Jewish, but only culturally. I do however like to throw a mini-seder for my non-Jewish friends who are interested in learning what it is all about. That and Jews know how to throw a ceremony. You see, I have cut down the ceremony to its most important parts (the plagues, the four questions, the telling of the story) but I have left in the meal and the four glasses of wine. Needless to say that it is a great meal and has as part of it an interesting history lesson. I will say though, listening to five people who don't know how to pronounce Hebrew (and me only barely) is not most pleasing sound to the ear.

The highlights of the meal are always the Brisket and the Matzo Ball soup. I have included my mom's Brisket recipe down below.

As part of the meal (both before and during) I probably drank about 6 or 7 glasses of wine. Now this is over about 3 to 4 hour period, but it still went to my head. Then after all that, Jason and I decided that we should try to go the 1200 Wine Bar again.

Needless to say, they were closed AGAIN!!! We had tried to go after Satellite on Tuesday but they had already called last call then. So instead we went to Wild Rose. We figured it was a Thursday so we should be ok. Plus if things seemed to be problematic, we could always have one quick drink and then bolt.

As it turned out, I really like the Wild Rose, despite the fact that I had apprehensions about it being Seattle's premier (only?) lesbian bar. I didn't really think that I was going have any trouble, but you always build these things up in your mind.

We had a really good time there. Mind you all we did was sit at the bar and chat with Florence our bartender, but she was really cool. The decor was nice, they were playing hair bands on the jukebox (which seemed strangely disturbing) and the drinks were good. Florence was even good enough to slip us some swag since we had a lot of drinking to do, and it would be a while before we came back. The strangest thing that happened though is that these two guys came in and tried to sell bizarre items (coin counter, Dani doll, etc...) to the bartenders with no such luck.

It is amazing the things you see on Capitol Hill.

Oh I will say, that in response my comment, "I was a little apprehensive about coming in here." Florence simply said, "Yeah, many people are. But we are very friendly." And yes they are.

-w00t

Brandon's Mom's Brisket Recipe

Enjoy.

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

Before we walked into The Wild Rose, I must admit that I was apprehensive. It is well known to be a lesbian hangout, and while I did not actually think I was going to get beaten up by a big butch lesbian, I couldn't be sure. But it is a bar in Seattle and it is close to my house, so we had to go there.

Walking in I could tell that I would go to this bar regularly, if it were not for the fact that I doubted there were any single women there interested in men, let alone me. It has ample bar space, numerous tables, interesting signage, a pool table (or two), a juke box, $2 Wells on Thursday, and a Count Chocula Bobble Head Doll.

When we walked in (three guys) no heads turned, there was no outcry against the male oppressors, and the bartender immediately came over and asked us what we wanted. Florence is excellent. She made us great drinks, didn't mock our quest, gave us swag, and was generally really amazing. Everyone needs to visit this bar and say hi to Florence (She's the tall busty Blonde).

The most bizarre part of the evening, would be when these two guys came in and tried to sell totally miscellaneous merchandise to Florence and her co-worker. They had coin sorter, a singing, skating Dani doll, and some other stuff. Florence said that this has only happened to her about 3 or 4 time in four years, so don't expect them to show up on your visit, but hey, who knows.

All in All, I give the Wild Rose Four Martini Glasses out of Five, but only because I'm not a lesbian.

-wOOt

It's kind of late, so I'll make this short.

Murphy's is the bar to go to with all your college friends. Get a pitcher. Take over a table in the noisy but spacious interior. Sit by the fire if you want. But don't, I repeat don't, order a cocktail, even though they'll have a sign suggesting just that. You'll wonder two things: Am I suddenly in Lilliput, because this is a small glass, and, Is there a shortage of alcohol, cause they didn't give me my fair share.

But other than that, it didn't suck. Like I said, a good place for a crowd.

Type: Hotel Bar/Restaurant
Class: Upscale

Your first real experience with the Dragonfish, comes when you walk into the small pre-lobby and are faced with two enormous wooden doors. These doors are just plain imposing and might cool. They have some weight to them as well and this very definitely adds to the mystique.

When you get in there however, you find a bizarre, interesting, and eclectic mix of styles and moods all under one roof. We went in on a Friday night at about 7:00 pm and it was just positively packed. Since we were there just for a drink, they let stand in the bar. There was no seating available, but we could stand if we liked. We did so.

The bar is probably the most interesting portion of the Cafe anyhow. There is nicely stocked bar and two bartenders. Behind the row of 5 small tables up on the wall there are Japanese "slot machines." I am not sure what kind of games they actually are, but each one is in a fake plastic color of bright red or bright yellow and has various blinking lights and happy dancing icons. They look very inviting, but as they are gambling machines, all of the coin slots are sealed.

The drinks are not inexpensive but Jason's screwdriver was made with fresh squeezed orange juice and my Dragon concoction was very good (if a little sour for my taste.)

Walking through the place I liked the different style compartments that packed into this restaurant. There was a sushi bar, with a yellow motif. Behind it was an open area wok based cook area (I believe) that was in more muted colors. Then in the far back away from all of the hub bub was a more quiet and personal section, for couples that want to whisper in peace.

We lingered a bit, but just as we were finishing our drinks, the waitress shooed us away from near her station and we decided it was time to leave anyway.

I very liked this place and want to come back with a mid size group for dinner. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar/Lounge
Class: Mid-Scale

I have absolutely nothing bad to say about the Cloud Room. In fact I love this place to death. It is located in the historic and slightly run down Camlin Hotel right on the northern edge of downtown.

One half of the Cloud Room is a high-end restaurant with excellent food. The other half is a piano bar with plush red chairs. In the center is banquet room that seats about 12 and in the back is a balcony that looks out over the highway. The one thing that every room has though is a view. That view ranges from the Space Needle and Queen Anne, to an apartment building and the highway. So it is true that you really need to pick your spot, but at sunset, it really doesn't matter where you stand as the soft light filters through the entire lounge.

The drinks are good, but who really notices them, when compared to the view. The staff ranges from friendly to standoffish, and while I have not actually heard their lounge singer, I imagine he simply adds to the experience.

The clientele is a mix of upwardly mobile locals, and low scale hotel guests. The guests of the Camlin are an interesting mix, but it is still a little hard to pick them out up in the Cloud Room.

All in All, I love this place and give it 5 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar/Restaurant/Lounge
Class: Upscale

The 727 is everything that a high-end bar and restaurant should be. Located in the Elliot Grand Hyatt, it has everything that you could possibly want from a high-end location, except maybe for inexpensive prices.

Coming in from the street you walk down a small set of stairs. On your left is a small comfortable lounge area raised over the rest of the bar. There low chairs, low tables, and waiters popping up and down to make sure everyone has everything they need. Following another small set of stairs down, you walk into the restaurant proper with a very attractive and well-stocked bar off to your left. The hostess is gracious and did not even blink an eye at our "very casual" dress. There was no talk of dress codes or anything that made us feel out of place, despite my initial concern. Looking further into the restaurant, we could see that there was another level further down with more seating next to the open kitchen area.

The decor of the 727 was chic and stylish. Sort of a neo minimalist chic, that was all shiny metal and light polished wood. The bar area was silver and glass and looked really swank. Waiters walked passed us with amazing looking meals, and this conical serving platform of French fries made we want to the $8 (I think) for a plate of them, but my number recollection may be a bit off. Jason and I were both pleasantly pleased with our eye candy selection, cute well-dressed women for me, clean cut, tall blonde men for him.

Now I realized that this was a nice place, but when I placed down a $20 for two well drinks (Screwdriver, G&T) I expected a little more than $7.50 back. Needless to say, I just smiled, left a tip and took the drinks back to the raised island where we were sitting. I had just started to gripe about the drink prices when I took my first sip. I can unequivocally say, that this was the best G&T that I had ever had. I don't know what was in it, but goddamn was it good. It was perfectly mixed, used an incredible gin and was everything I ever dreamed that a G&T could be. Jason and I joked that they well booze must be better than the named booze I usually order (Tanqueray.) We envisioned a conversation going like this:

"Hi I'd like a Tanqueray and Tonic."
"Are you sure sir, our basic Gin is of a much greater quality than that." The bartender then follow with a very sniff.
"Uh sure. But how much better quality."
"Oh, about 3 steps. I would have to charge you more for the Tanqueray as you asked for it by name, but I really don't recommend it."

And so I would happily drink well drinks here forever and never, ever know what kind of gin they used, except for the fact that it wasn't Tanqueray.

For morbidities sake we check out the menu. Everything sounded great, but the "Bar Crunch" for $3 struck us as a little odd.

Having said all that, I must simply say that at 727 you pay for the best and you get the best. If I have someone that I want to impress, I will be taking them here. I give 727 5 Martini Glasses placed stylishly on a chic countertop out of 5.

-w00t

The main purpose of our Friday night excursion was to see The Fellowship of the Ring again, and specifically to see the new Two Towers trailer that was just released on today. I called a bunch of friends but none of them were interested in meeting us. Jason talked to his co-workers, and a bunch of them were interested, but all had reasons as to why they would probably not be able to make it. Thus it ended up being just Jason and me and a host of downtown bars that we needed to hit.

I was dressed kind of shoddily, but Jason simply said, that this was Seattle and no one was going to notice. I will say in his defense that he was entirely correct. Even in this really nice place, no one seemed to bat an eye at my attire. Of course I didn't really take off my leather jacket in a couple of them, but that hardly matters.

We started off with Dragonfish Asian Cafe, in the Paramount Hotel. I really liked the feel of this place, but I just wish that it wasn't packed to the gills at dinnertime on a Friday night. We were allowed to stand in the bar and have a drink, but eventually a waitress shooed us away as we were standing in front of her waitress station.

From there we went to an old favorite, The Cloud Room in the Camlin Hotel. The Cloud Room is great, but I have never seen it so crowded. We tried to find a seat and simply couldn't. We were going to sit and have dinner there, but seeing as how the menu is mostly $20 entrees, we decided against it. Instead we stood out on the balcony and discussed how the quest was going. One of the interesting things we talked about was how this quest had totally changed our perspective on bars and going out. It was now like work, and while we enjoyed it, the drinks themselves didn't really provide us with the same level of enjoyment as they once did. Now it was more the experience of trying out a new place rather than simply the drinks. I do hope that we are able to get more people to go out with us, cause they will slow us down (as you will see by tonight we are pretty quick when we are determined.)

After the Cloud Room, we went to 727 in the Elliot Grand Hyatt. Now this is a nice place and I took a certain sort of satisfaction sitting in the bar wearing my Milwaukee County Jail shirt (long story.) Anyhow, I simply have to that this bar is everything that I would want in a place if I had more money than I knew what to do with. Jason and I ordered well drinks and I handed the bartender a $20. I will say I was a little distraught when he handed me back $7.50. Blinking briefly I took the money, left a tip, and took the drinks over. I explained the price and Jason looked equally concerned. We then sipped our drinks. I can unequivocally say that this was the best G&T I have ever had. Not only was it mixed perfectly, but I suspect that they well booze, is much stuff than what I ask for Gin by name (Tanqueray.) Jason's Screwdriver was obviously made with fresh squeezed orange juice and was equally good.

From there we went to Desert Fire for dinner. There is not much to say about Desert Fire except that the drinks are average and food is good. I like the atmosphere and breadsticks are excellent. I of course, left my doggie bad on the table. I hate that.

We still had about 15 minutes before the movie so we headed downstairs for a quick drink at Vons. Let me just say that if you liked my review of Murphy's, then you will love this one. I do not, and let me stress this again, DO NOT, recommend you go to Von's for a drink. A friend of mine (who happens to be a health inspector) recommends that you don't eat there either. It’s not a cleanliness thing, but rather they use the cheapest alcohol known to man and then charge you top shelf prices. Screw dat. Their only saving grace was that they had square glasses. I really like those for some reason.

Then we went to the movie. This 3 hours of no drinking imposed on us was probably a very good thing. I do feel kind of sorry for the two couples sitting between the aisle and us. We each only got up once, but we tried to sit somewhere where there wouldn't be people between the aisle and us.

While the movie was a bit slow the 3rd time, the action sequences were still very good. Galadriel's monologue did not get any better the 3rd time around though and I still very unhappy with it, but I suppose when I get to remake Lord of the Rings with Cate Blanchett I will do it my way. Until then, I will have to deal.

But the real reason for the viewing was the Two Trailers Preview at the end. It was 3 and half minutes of pure joy. I now remember what it felt like seeing the Fellowship trailers for the first time, and it was good. We get to see many awesome things, but the two best are: An Ent's eye, and Gandalf looking like Saruman (you can finally understand how they can be confused.)

After that we went to the Old Pequliar for a quick drink. It was there that we decided that weekends really were the wrong time to get a good feel for a place. It is too crowded and the bartenders are in fill em and spill em mode. They don't want to chat, they only want to get you your drink and send you on your way. Our waitress was nice and sassy and I liked that. She made a comment about how my shirt was going to get me beaten up. At first I thought it was because it was a "jail shirt" and it would make me seem like a tough guy. It is only now, as I am thinking about it, that I realize that it is because it is bright orange and I was in an Irish Bar (doh!). Well, live and learn.

Then I dropped Jason off and went home. All in all, an excellent night. We saw a great preview, hit six bars, and had some truly awesome (and one truly terrible) drinks.

-w00t

Type: Sport’s Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

There is nothing Grand about Von's. That is, nothing except for the Grand rip-off that they perform every time that they pour a drink from their giant wall of alcohol. I will say that while it is cool looking, it only dispenses large quantities of crap for extravagant prices.

Von's cannot decide what it is. Their bar is almost like a sports bar, but it isn't. There is lots of sports memorabilia and advertising, but the bar is too crowded and there are no sports games. The restaurant may be fine, but after talking to a friend of mine, he said that we really shouldn't eat there, and here's why. The rest of the bar is like a Bull & Finch wanna be with old style political cartoons in the bathroom, and a hodge podge of Americana on the walls.

The place has a little bit of style, with a giant heat lamp in the front foyer, square glasses, and surly waitresses.

But none of this, I mean none of this, can exempt a place from committing the cardinal bar sin. That would be seriously overcharging for CRAP!!!. If I'm paying more than $5 for a well drink, even downtown, I better be getting something better than Monarch Vodka. I don't remember what kind of gin it was, but it was equally bad. Oh sure, if you are a captive audience you can and should expect crap (like at a ball game, or on a plane), but when there is choice not 100 feet from where you are, well, you better rethink your policy.

Now as for the clientele, they all appeared to be low-end grunt type white-collar downtown workers. I almost fall into that category (except that I don't work downtown), but they all lacked color. They did not seem like an interesting or exciting group. They were huddled in their little work groups with their half on half off ties, or their unbuttoned, buttoned down shirts. In a nutshell, this was not quality white-collar clientele.

So, while the drink I received was stronger than the Catholic date I got at Murphy's it was instead with her ugly older sister, who the father has given up on. Sure you can date her, if you can stomach her, but please, just spend a little money on her so that she feels loved.

So I give Von's 1 dirty Martini Glass out of 5 and no tip.

-wOOt

I am not that picky about what I drink. Whether is it is fine taste of the top shelf, or the bitter after taste of the well, I like my drinks to range appropriately.

Sure, you will find the occasional bar where you can get high quality liquor for very reasonable price but usually these places are making up for a lack in atmosphere, clientelle, or location. So they lure you in with a cheap, high quality drink. Of course this also means that you have to suffer with the environment it is served in. On the other end you have the cardinal sin of bars, and that comes in the form of over priced crap.

There is absolutely nothing worse than paying $5 or more for absolute and total crap. If they charge me $5 and they serve me monarch, then I better be getting the waitress over here making with the favors because otherwise I end up walking out of the place with a limp cause my ass hurts.

The rules are fairly easy, so why can't places follow them:

1) If you serve crap, charge low ($3-$4) - Goldies
2) If you serve quality, charge quality ($5-$6) - 727
3) If you have your clientelle trapped with no escape (Ball games, Airplanes) charge whatever you like - Safeco Field
4) If there are other, better bars within a block of your establishment, charge a similar or less expensive price than them, especially when you are using cheaper crap - Von's is the major violator of this rule

There is a corrolary to this, that I only recently encountered, and that has to do with the fact that size matters. Now ladies, be quiet in the peanut gallery. I am talking about the size of the glass here. When you serve a drink, it should be at least average tumbler size. If you are going to serve crap in a small glass, then you should be beat about the head and shoulders or give it away for a $1.

However, I have noticed that many places, at least the nicer places, will serve you in big glasses, with a generous dose. I like this. I like this alot. But skimping on the booze, because you put in a tall glass, is uncalled for. I will say that I have not witnessed this yet, but I suspect that I will find it.

So in a nut shell remember:

1) The price of the drinks should be equivilant to the quality of the booze
2) Never under pour
3) Don't insult me with a tiny glass

-w00t

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Neighborhood

The Old Pequliar is medium sized building that has been designed to look like a pub. It has the traditional faux Old World wood exterior with the dark shingles that tell you there is heavy drinking inside. Opening the door you almost run into a table that is spaced a little too close to the front door and is always empty, except when the place is totally packed. The interior of this pub has a homey, almost closed in feel to it. It is always dim, smoky, and a little claustrophobic in the front. This is despite the fact that there is actually quite a bit of room and seating in the front area. I think that it has something to do, with how many tables are packed into this area and the spacing of the pillars. To explain, there are a number of pillars throughout the place and they are located in kind of annoying places. There is one between the door and the bar, and there is another one that compresses the walking space past the bar up to the back room. Most people probably wouldn’t notice it, but I like to be able to walk with having to shift myself (unless of course I am shouldering my way to the front of a concert hall.

Sitting at the end of the bar, we ordered drinks and got sassed by the bartender (I know this is kind of chauvinistic, but I only use the word sassed when speaking about females.) I have to admit that I liked the sassing. It was nice. Bartenders with spunk are fun, but it was hard to say if she was naturally surly/sassy or if it was just her Friday night modus.

The Pequliar has a back area with a couple of high tables, a single pool table, a single dart board, and a small “lounging” area, with comfortable looking/run down chairs. It was kind of hard to tell without walking up to them.

The drinks were slightly below average. A little weak for the price, but it was Friday night, so who knows. I will mention that you probably shouldn’t wear orange when going there. I did and that was I why got sassed. I always forget that some Irish folks still take offense to that color.

The crowd in here is usually young, but tend to have a more jock, lower middle class, or student feel. It seems to attract that kind of crowd that an Irish Pub always seems to attract, which is the kind of good basic people that you often find in the outlying Seattle districts. Not rich people, but just your average middle class/just graduated college students. There are no ex-Microsoft execs hanging out here. I did have a brief coversation with a guy about the All-Blacks, the New Zealand Rugby team. But this really just supports my description.

Anyhow, the Old Pequliar is an ok bar with a decent neighborhood feel. I do recommend that you order the Harp and avoid the wells. I give it 2 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

A good, reliable sports bar. The drinks are acceptable, the place has pool, darts and video games, and everything is pretty much all right with the world while you're there.

Thursdays they have trivia night; get a question right, and your order is half price. Nice for those who have fountains of trivial knowledge to hand.

j.

I mentioned a little about Changes in my journal.

So here's a little more. It's a small place, and kind of worn, but it's not bad. The prices are low (a Finlandia Cranberry and cran was $3.50), the pour is pretty strong, and they have drink specials, too.

There's TVs, but they play the Golden Girls.

The crowd is kind of older and rather male.

Overall, it was a decent sort of place for a drink.

j.

I didn't like this place. The bartender was middle-aged and had obviously seen it all, and didn't care to see us and our crazy little idea. The karaoke was terrible. The place wasn't very big. But then, I was a little drunk at the time, which both makes my perceptions a little skewed, and my memory a little patchy.

Still, it's been my least favorite stop, with the possible exception of Von's. I would recommend skipping it.

Our first stop on the second night, and the place was empty. It's a sports bar, with big TVs, and one lonely pool table and dart board in the back. But there were no sporty types present, in fact, the place was nearly deserted. Which is too bad, because they were friendly, they didn't have a short pour for the drinks like you might expect so close to a college, and it seemed like a nice sort of place to just hang out.

Perhaps this was influenced by running into people I knew, but that's okay. I've got to base my writing on what was happening.

It's a pretty good high-end dive.

Flowers. I've been here often. I really rather like the place. It's an after-work hang out. So there's not much I can say about my visit for the quest, cause it was really short.

Instead, I'll just talk about Flowers.

Get a table. Order some drinks. Have the Prince Mazza plate. They'll bring you more pita if you run out. And enjoy yourself. Cause you will. The wait staff is friendly, and if you get there early enough to actually claim a table, a good time will be had by all. Perhaps that's why the place is always so full.

Highly recommended.

It's both classy and not. I like the front of the bar, which has a few (slightly wobbly) tables, a nice looking bar, stools, the whole thing. But in the back, in the performance space, it all looks a little iffy.

Still, it was good. The place is pretty pleasant, the staff seems very casual, and the drinks are all right. I commend them for supporting bands. I'm not sure what, if anything, could get made better. But it seems like something might be improvable.

All in all, a pretty decent place. I'd go back.

I talked a bit about this place in my journal. Very little more to add. Just that I very much like the weirdly ecclectic feel of the place, and I think you should all go there, often, to watch bands.

Just avoid the fog machines.

This is a good place. A nice looking hotel bar, in the Warwick Hotel across from the Cinerama Theater. Very classy, and the staff is very pleasant. The drinks are good, and while they're a little spendy, it's worth it for both the look of the place, and the relative isolation. You're in a quiet sort of hotel bar, which is nice, and it would be a good place for an intimate little date. They have a bar menu, which while not full, is certainly adequet.

So bring your date to the Brasserie, and have a good time.

Very nice. Too nice for me, really. This place screams quality, from the tasteful surroundings to the so-fresh-there's-chunks-of-orange juice. The drinks weren't weak, the staff wasn't surly even though we rather obviously didn't belong there, and it wasn't a bad experience in any way.

While I wouldn't go back there normally, it'd be a good place for something special.

They're a restaurant, too. Mainly, even. With, as I understand it, rather good food. But that's outside of my area of concern.

Type: Restaurant
Class: Midscale

Desert Fire is a southwestern themed restaurant at the top of the Pacific Place mall. For mall food it is pretty good, but then again, the Pacific Place is a pretty nice mall. Jason and I went there for dinner in order to kill some time before the Two Towers Trailer.

The Desert Fire motif is both interesting and lame, depending on where you focus. Looking up at the antler lamps just makes you think of a bad family restaurant. However, looking at the cool wrought iron menu holders and bar flourishes, it is easy to forget the stupidity of looking up.

The menu is excellent and they have the best breadsticks and “southwest” cream cheese. They are terribly dangerous because all I want to do is sit there and nosh on breadsticks. Mmmmmm … tasty, tasty breadsticks.

My drink was average and priced at about $4. There is a patio, which I recommend if the weather is good. The staff is friendly and helpful and it is an all around decent place. It doesn’t really have much in the way of a bar atmosphere. You’d be better off going over to Gordon Birsch next door if you insist on drinking in a mall.

I give Desert Fire 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

It is the morning after we went to the Norwescon parties. While we were in the same hotel as Norwescon, we did not attend the con. There really is no point to it. Plus, at the heinous cost, it was not worth it to attend it properly. Instead we crashed the parties, drank in the bar, and hung out with people we know, people we haven't seen in ages and people we might like to get to know better. Plus there were attractive women in PVC, which always makes things better.

Now unfortunately, Norwescon is held in Seatac, which is not Seattle, so all of our drinking was wasted (except for having a good time, I suppose.) We drove up via 99 but there just are not any bars on 99 between downtown and Seatac.

The next day, Jason, Sean, Shanda, Red and I went to the Ballard Denny's for brunch. Now I have to say that the Ballard Denny's is on our list. They have a separate bar area and serve drinks to the main seating establishment. As such we were able to get food and knock more place off of our list. The meal was typical, and our waiter was nice, if a bit high strung and over worked.

Oh, and big ups to Wolf for completing his 40 days of non-drinking Lent successfully and then refusing a free drink because it was 2 in the afternoon. I guess we all have to have our limits.

I will say that when I dropping Jason off at home later that night, we did consider hitting one more Ballard bar, but decided against it. Are we growing soft after less than a week? God I hope not :)

-w00t

Type: Denny’s
Class: Denny’s

Now what could I possibly say about Denny’s here. I will simply sum it up as follows: It is Denny’s. It has a bar. You can get drinks while you eat your Dagwood at 2:00 in the afternoon. Now come on, what were you expecting. I can’t even rate this. I just can’t do it. Could you?

-w00t

I've been to the Rickshaw many times before. It is perhaps the best place I know to go with a hangover for a morning after. And while I wasn't quite hungover when we went there, it was a near thing. They have ample food, and great crappy diner coffee, and I just like the joint.

They also have a full bar. Which is open for an hour after the restaurant is closed, although our waitress pretty much assured us you could still get food in that hour, cause the cooks were still there, as they were also the clean up crew.

Really, though, this was just a gimme. We were there, the booze was there, and the prices were super cheap.

They also have drink specials, and happy hour for like 9 hours in the morning/afternon. Check it out.

A decent place. Nice looking inside. Drinks were okay. There's nothing much to really report about it.

A big brew pub, but with a full bar also. I understand they make their own beer, but I've heard it's a problem for a number of people. For me, the drink was fine, but the place was a bit too big and empty for me to really have liked it.

I mentioned quite a bit about this place in my journal. And I don't know that I have much to add. They give good value for your dollar, since their singles are almost doubles. That's important to note. Other than that, I think I've said all I need to elsewhere.

Great holiday, Passover. It's a memorial, a ritual occasion, a chance to have a great meal with friends, and a chance to drink a lot of wine.

More than that, it didn't slow us down on the path to our goal. Rather, Passover served as a jumping off point for the Wild Rose. After dinner, Brandon and I, along with our webmaster Sean, went there, and we had a great time. Everyone was friendly, there were strange guys selling crappy toys, and a nice girl bought a drink for a slightly scary troll woman, totally anonymously.

I then went home and wished I hadn't had so many glasses of wine. But it went okay, and nothing major resulted. Huzzah.

I highly recommend everyone make a brisket as soon as they're able. So tasty.

This was a big night. First, and perhaps foremost, the trailer for the Two Towers was released attached to the Fellowship of the Ring. So Brandon and I planned to go see a 9:10 show downtown, which would give us about 2 1/2 hours to check out some local bars.

We started with the vastly crowded Dragonfish, a most excellent hotel restaurant. After a quick stop there, and a testy waitress who had some reason to be testy, but still, we moved on to the Cloud Room on the top floor of the Camlin Hotel. Fortunately, it was mild enough to have our drinks outside, because the place was packed. Knowing we needed to get a bite to eat, we almost stopped here, but the prices are a bit high, so we didn't.

Our next stop was the 727, in the Elliot/Hyatt hotel. If you have the means, eat here. Often. It's terribly swanky. Sadly, I lack the means. From there, we returned to the Pacific Place mall, wherein we were to see the FotR. We stopped in at Desert Fire, a supposedly southwestern eatery that has interesting cuisine and acceptable drinks. The food was better than the booze, and (odd to say this) the service was too fast, so that we were left with a gap of almost a half an hour before our show.

That brought us to Von's. I don't recommend allowing much of anything to bring you to Von's.

After the movie (great film, and great trailer at the end. Ents!) we made a stop by my house, at the Old Pequliar, an Irish-esque pub in Ballard. There's a lot of Irish pubs in this town. There was a crowd of collegiate types, it being a Friday, and after just the one drink, and pretty much sober from the enormous length of FotR, we called it a night, cause it was kind of late, and six bars seemed like plenty.

I'm told that outside of our greater metropolises, Denny's Restaurants very frequently have bars. Not so within Seattle, where a Denny's bar is a rarity. Fortunately, the Denny's in Ballard, where I live, has one, and as it was on our list anyway, and as the after-effects of a few parties last night had left me in a great want of breakfast food even in the early afternoon, we journeyed with a party of like minded souls to Denny's meeting up with sundry persons there. Or really, there were just five of us.

We had food, which was kind of slow, cause it's Easter Sunday after all, and the brunch crowd was out in force. We had drinks. Mine came with a monster straw, so as, I suppose, to facilitate rapid consumption. I'm not sure what that implies. And then we mosied.

I'm presuming most people have been to Denny's, so I don't need to say much more.

How much did I like this place? Enough to say it's in the top three of the places we've been, hanging at present with the Tin Hat and the Cloud Room. It's a great bar, with friendly people, including our great bartender Florence. And the drinks are fine, they gave us stuff for the next night's giveaway a night early, there's pool. What more does one need. Visit the Wild Rose, ready for two things: a good time, and (important) the fact that it's a lesbian bar. Which won't stop the first thing, but you should at least be ready for it.

Highly recommended.

Okay, don't get me wrong, I love tipping. I love tips in general, and I've never even worked for them. Although much of my younger life, I was definitely supported by them, since my mom was a bartender from the time I was about 6 onwards to almost the present.

What I don't like about tips at bars is the need to make them blind. What I mean is, if you're paying cash, or as is the case with the 570bars crew, just buying a single round on your card, you pretty much make our your tip before you've got much of an idea about the drink, the bar, or anything involved. So, if the drink is terrible (hello to the Murphy's Gin and Tonic), you'll probably end up tipping just the same, percentage wise, as if it were great (big ups to the 727's G-and-T perfection.)

I know that people who work in tipping fields get taxed as if they were getting tips at something like 8 percent. So I recognize the need to tip that bare minimum at least. And I always feel better if I'm tipping in the neighborhood of 20 percent. But some places, I just want the freedom to tip the low end if the service is terrible, or the drinks are awful. Instead, it's all about tipping heavy at first to bribe them to make you a good drink on the next round, or for the rest of the night.

So now, in general, we've got a new policy. Tip as you leave. Not as you order, not as you pay, but as you leave. That way, the tip reflects your actual satisfaction. And that's what we're going to do from now on. Strong drinks? Tasty drinks? Friendly people? You'll be rewarded. Shitty drinks? Drinks where alcohol is a foreign concept? Surly staff? You'll get your 8 percent, cause you need that, but nothing more. I'm not out to screw anyone. But I'm sick and tired of having to pay to get acceptable, not even extraordinary, service.